


You Will Always Find Hope Shining There

by FancyFulOfLife



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Minor Character Death, Minor Injuries, School Shootings, So Buck Did Too, shit gets real
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-06
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:01:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 22,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22590664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FancyFulOfLife/pseuds/FancyFulOfLife
Summary: Life as we know it can change in a second.
Relationships: Christopher Diaz & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Eddie Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 64
Kudos: 449
Collections: 9-1-1 Tales, Navy SEAL!Evan "Buck" Buckley





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So in Buddie fic recs on discord they were talking about killing off either Eddie and Buck more because we apparently need more angst in our lives  
> Then this idea hit me  
> So if you have to go rock in a corner like I did after writing it because it took me a loooong time to write it like since I started it 1/25 because I had to keep stepping away and grounding myself  
> All I have to say is be careful what you wish and ask for
> 
> February 28th is Rare Disease Awareness Day, so in honor of that along with Christopher he gets a new friend that’s just as special 
> 
> I would like to shout out and thank Shania and Jenny for listening to this idea, encouraging me to write it and not telling me I’m a psychopath for coming up with it.
> 
> I have also learned I will never be able to write anything 5k like I intend

Bobby finds him sitting on the curb across from the closed off two story building with a collection of smaller one level structures around it, a former place of joy and encouragement that won’t be reopening anytime soon maybe never again if the plans they are making for the site come to fruition; right where Athena told her husband he would be.

Bobby isn’t sure it can even be called a building anymore. Can buildings be ghosts? If one ever could it would be this one with the haunting it has left behind in it’s wake.

What used to be a building covered in glass windows to let in the sunshine and make an enclosed space feel more open is now just a shell of what it used to be surrounded by dismembered limbs. Like the skeleton of a body after the skin, muscle and nervous system has decayed away. The entrance a gaping hole of crumbled concrete and steel still _hemorrhaging_ out into the cement courtyard that no pressure bandage can stop.

He’s where he has been everyday for the past six weeks when Athena drives by to check on him. The same time everyday like clockwork. She knows the exact time to check. Everyone knows. It’s embedded deep into their souls like a tattoo that can never be removed.

She’s admitted whenever she sees him sitting there her heart breaks. It’s made even the toughest woman Bobby knows come home and just cry in his arms almost everyday for him, for the lost. Although she was there she didn’t see the destruction inside, she stayed on crowd control but by his face she didn’t need to. Didn’t want to. Her imagination from the reports enough and she already had plenty of nightmares, his face since that day tells her what happened inside. It’s also one of her newest nightmares.

Phone calls everyday to May when she knows she’s in her dorm room. Keeping Harry closer to her at night and him letting her. Michael letting her have more time with him even though he’s just as shook.

He’s not depressed. Not broken or lost. He’s past anger. You can look at his face and just see the haunted look of a man that finally saw it. That thing that changes you forever. The thing you never unsee. The look of something you’ve lost that you can never have back.

As fire firefighters, any first responder, you go into a call hoping for the best yet expecting the worse. There are some worse that can't be fathomed, even in this job. Some worse you never want to be a part of that goes beyond just another bad day on the job. You watch the news and give praise it wasn’t your city, your family. You have that moment of guilt that you feel that way but then you see a photograph or get a text saying I Love You and pick up something as mundane as milk then the relief washes over you again. You’re there to be able to pick up the milk for your family that is safe.

You feel a sense of wrongness to what happened. The why. You mourn for the life lost. You try to make sense of it that never comes because it doesn’t make sense but it wasn’t your family, your family is safe. You can pick up the damn milk.

This time the worse was their burden to carry and it rocked them to the core.

Bobby is in his Captain’s uniform but he’s wearing his normal civilian attire, jeans, a white Henley and boots. It’s late September in Los Angeles, the weather is still warm. The sun is shining, it’s a nice warm day. The sun has been shining for the past six weeks.

It’s been six weeks to the day, six Wednesdays, but they still don’t know the casualty count of what happened. Bobby knows when something massive occurs you never know the true casualty count.

No one ever counts the living as part of the casualties.

Bobby pulls his SUV up behind the other vehicle, parking, cutting off the engine and just sits there watching him with his legs crossed together, his hands in his lap. The beacon of a bandage on his hand a constant reminder they could have lost him, too. He’s just staring at the building as if trying to will it to magically go back to what it used to be. That laughter would reappear, that children would be running around outside smiling and giggling. A family would no longer be missing a loved one.

That innocence lost would be found again.

With a sigh Bobby gets out of his car. Eyes on him. He doesn’t even flinch at the car door shutting. He hasn’t flinched in six weeks. Like Bobby hasn’t been checking in on him himself. Every time getting a “I’m fine. Yes, I'm eating. You didn't have to bring food. You might as well stay for the game.” He may not be at the firehouse right now but he still has eyes on his boy. The whole family does.

Chim told him Maddie has stopped talking about wedding dates.

They know what’s coming. Everyone has been walking on pins and needles at the firehouse. They have already been on edge because of what happened, each dealing with their own nightmare in their own way, but waiting for the inevitable only adds to it. The building in front of them isn’t the only place missing laughter. It’s not the same. Unlike before they realize what’s missing now. Realize it will never be the same. They’ll never be the same.

Life will never be the same.

Witness to a tragedy, a loss and a goodbye.

No, they’ll never be the same.

It was the phone call that prompted this visit. The ONE Bobby knew was coming, the one he has been dreading to get but knew it was inevitable. He was hoping it would take longer. Who was he kidding? Himself mostly.

Bobby was hoping the call would never come until he was old and retired. Part of the reason he was in dress uniform for the second time in the past six weeks is because of that call. He just came from seeing the Fire Chief.

He could fight for him. He would fight for him. He should have fought harder before. Bobby knows the fight has left him, is sure he doesn't want that fight. So, he fights for him just by being his friend. His family. A father figure and mentor he’s always tried to be.

The Fire Chief would do anything for him despite the break of protocol.

He's done. Before Bobby got the dreaded phone call you could tell by his eyes that he's done. That shatters Bobby's heart into a million pieces, much like his wife's, knowing even when it gets put back together pieces will be missing. He’s walking towards those pieces he’ll never get back now.

“Hey.” Bobby says, sitting beside him. Uniform and scuff marks be damned. He's not going to ask him how he is. He already knows how he is. He's fine but he's not okay. No one will be able to tell when the okay will come. He can go to therapist after therapist. Talk until he no longer has a voice but that won't make this okay.

There’s nothing okay about any of it.

Then he just starts talking.

“The sun is shining. When I was little and I was living with her, whenever I’d get upset about not being able to go outside because it was raining my Abuela would tell me when it rains the angels weep for you, when the sun shines they rejoice for you. It hasn’t rained in forty-two days. Before that we had days of downpours but not a drop in forty-two days. It should be raining. Forty-two days straight of rain. It should be flooded because of so much rain. Instead it’s been cloudless, warm, sunny skies. The angels should be weeping, not rejoicing. There is nothing to rejoice about what happened here.”

Bobby stays quiet. Looking at his profile. Thinking how far the man beside him has come, how different he is now from when they first met. It’s been six weeks and they have no clue what the casualty count really is.

They never will.

45 Days Ago

“Have I mentioned there is one thing I hate more than September rainstorms in Los Angeles?” Eddie yells over the sound of the saw. “August rainstorms.”

“What’s the difference? People can’t even drive when it isn’t raining no matter the month.” Buck yells back as he holds the metal steady. “Hey, did Christopher find his surprise?”

“You mean the exact replica of a fire truck lunchbox that opens like one of those old fashioned ones he has been going on and on about showing off when school starts Wednesday? If he gets lead poisoning I’m kicking your ass now that you’ve been off the blood thinners. How did you find one with a strap that will attach to his crutches without it banging against it. By the way, why the hell do they start a new school year off in the middle of the week?” Eddie turns the saw off as the metal rebar holding the cement to the building breaks, handing it over to the other firefighter standing beside him.

“No worries about lead, I had it custom made with the input of the Cerebral Palsy groups I belong to on Facebook. Those types of groups are very helpful. It’s actually made of what bullet proof vests are. A police officer in Kentucky had one made for his son to look like a cop car, he knew exactly what I wanted even got me in touch with the guy that made his, and if you’re still game to go for the title, I’d still take you.” Buck grins at him as he lifts the cement block off the car with all the weight on his knees to protect his back. “August 12th is even earlier than last year. I swear he just got out for the Summer. I’m filing a formal complaint. They’re interfering with my Christopher time.”

“You keep buying him the awesome stuff and everyone is going to think you’re the cool dad. I’d like to see you try to take me. Hey, watch it Hercules. You know the rain makes your leg sore.” Eddie takes over some of the weight as he stands close beside him. “Your Christopher, huh? You gonna start paying for half his tuition?” Eddie smirks.

“Eddie, face it. I am the cool dad. Wait. You need help with that? I thought the scholarship we found had everything covered?” They both heave the cement block off the hood of the car. No gas leak. Didn’t make it near the windshield. This woman was damn lucky.

“Buck, Buck I’m kidding. Besides you already pay for half the groceries.”

“To be fair I eat half the groceries.”

“You also got him a Disney+ subscription. Don’t get me started on the Baby Yoda you bought him.”

Buck just looks at Eddie, head tilted. “Edmundo Ramon Diaz are you suggesting the adorableness of that little boy does not equal to or surpass that of one Baby Yoda that should be protected at all costs from all evil doers out to get him because of his magical powers.”

“Buck. He’s a little boy. He doesn’t have magical powers.” Eddie leans one arm up against the building, taking off his helmet and wiping his forehead with the other. Friggin’ rain.

With a gasp Buck covers his chest. Then with the straightest face he deadpans. “The dimples. Which he gets from you. Are his magical powers. Plus, the eye thing.”

“Don’t blame the eye thing on me. He gets that one from you. Sometimes I wonder if you are actually Baby Yoda since he’s a little shit that likes to cause trouble.”

“Yes, but I’m your little shit that causes trouble. Admit it.” Buck says **_doing the eye thing._**

“Yeah, that needs protecting from all evil doers.” Eddie murmurs thinking no one heard.

Someone did hear though.

Bobby wonders for a moment, as he stands there supervising the crash site clean up, in all his years and thinking his hopeful newfound wisdom now that he has a sexy as hell woman to go home to every night, if he was ever this stupid over a person that he didn’t realize they loved him, are dating and have a kid together.

“Don’t you have to be dating or married for one of you to be the cool dad?” Chimney pipes up from leaning into the empty driver side of the car. The woman having been speeding and hitting a patch of water making her car crash into the cement building. Of course the open margarita can in the car’s cup holder was not evidence in her favor. Those things are a first responders nightmare. People don’t understand it’s worse than drinking a beer while driving. By the looks of the passenger floor, it was her fourth can. Must have been a bad Sunday brunch with the parents if she was kicking them back that hard.

It wouldn’t be a surprise if she had a few mimosas in her system as well.

Luckily the woman lived. Most likely the alcohol in her system had her loose and limber enough for the impact. Hen has her at the ambulance now, bandaging her arm while Athena questions her. Also luck was on her side when she didn’t hit any pedestrians. Or her head but the airbag did deploy. She’ll go in for a CT anyway, plus blood work.

“Something you guys want to share?” Bobby joins in on the ribbing, eyes crinkling at the corners but otherwise wearing his usual stone face. So, he was rooting for his boys. Nobody had to know that. Now he has to rethink letting them around heavy machinery. Not that he questions their job performance. Just…them. How can they not tell flirting when they see it? They do it so much it’s like their subconscious automatically blurts the words out.

The eye communication thing that even freaks him out at times. He verbally has to tell them to give him something, everyone does. One of them just looks at the other and what they need appears or the other is suddenly in just the right spot. Not even Hen and Chim are that in sync.

Seriously, have you ever just wanted to smack two people so much because the frustration is bad for your blood pressure or enough to give you an ulcer and heart burn? Can you list dumbass oblivious idiots as a health problem under the “other” part of the checklist?

It’s times like this he regrets being Captain. Then again they would never have to know it was him that pushes them into a closet, blocks it from the outside with a box of condoms, some lube and a note saying get your shit together. They’ll most likely think its Chim. At this point he doesn’t care if it’s during shift or not. Be like Nike and just do it already.

Eddie rolls his eyes, pushing away from the building. “You don’t have to be in a relationship to have a great co-parent for your kid.” Eddie stops mid stride, “No betting pools, Chim. If I find out…”

Bobby notices a slight one second facial change in Buck.

Hen walks up, “I think he learned his lesson the last time when you two put peanut butter in his helmet. We’re ready to roll, Chim. Let’s get going before another rainstorm comes up.”

“Hey, at least his hair was good and conditioned for a month!” Buck yells in their direction trying to sound like his normal pain in the ass self. On one hand, friend zoned. On the other, co-parent. He could live with that if he had his Diaz boys.

Athena saunters over with her familiar you really want to start something with me gait.“We ready to wrap up fellas? CSU wants a look at the car since alcohol is involved before it starts raining again. To answer your question, Eddie. When I was in school we got out in May and didn’t go back until after Labor Day. They were still going by the kids need to be home to work the family farm time. They should have more days off during the year for you to get your Diaz family time fix, Buckaroo.”

“We got to go to the zoo yesterday. Cool dad over there spent at least fifty bucks on giraffe food so Christopher could feed them to his hearts content. Then HE” Eddie points directly at Buck, “fed HIM cotton candy.”

“The giraffes make him smile. Do you really want to deny anyone that smile? Besides we got the best photos out if it and I worked that sugar high out of him at the zoo’s playground, thank you very much.”

“Oh, I want to see!” Athena exclaims. Its starting to get hard to stay stone faced around this bunch.

“Hold on a sec.” Buck fishes out his phone, texting Athena the album.

“Oh, this one! You have got to frame this one!”

Bobby looks over her shoulder to see the three smiling at the camera, Buck holding Chris with Eddie's chin on Buck's shoulder, his arms wrapped around both with a giraffe photo bomb. It looks like a bystander took the photo. Seeing the looks on their faces you would think it was a loving family outing.

“Hey that reminds me, it’s my turn to pick up the pizza after shift.” Eddie says while jumping up into the truck.

“You sure you’re okay with two pizza and movie nights in a row?” Buck asks putting his headset on.

“Well, we can’t deny you your Christopher time, now can we? Ow.” Eddie let’s out a fake cry when Buck lightly punches his arm. "You wound me. I’m gonna have to rethink that co-parenting thing. You may be a bad influence on my son.”

“Yeah, tell him that and see how long it takes for him to speak to you again. Especially since I have the Minions 2 DVD waiting at home for a certain someone to hit play on the remote.” Buck grins at him.

Eddie sticks his tongue out at him. Bobby wonders who is really the bad influence one on who here.

“Dios mío. You are the cool dad.” Bobby holds in the laughter at the look on Eddie’s face.

“Compromise. You pick up the pizza and I’ll stop by my place and get both movies to bring to your place instead of mine and we watch the first Minions tonight. Besides, I haven’t gotten my mail in a week and I think my ficus plant is dying from lack of attention. I might bring it with me, too.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, it’s just a movie. The company is more important. Plus, it’s easier to get Christopher to his bed than the pull out cot upstairs after a long day and just go to sleep instead of worrying about you driving.” Bobby can’t take this and has never been happier Chim and Hen aren’t in the truck with them because he would have to bust their asses for ruining this kind of moment. Athena’s let nature take it’s course advice was hard to handle. Then again her pointing out a family portrait was a bit going against her own advice but since he likes his bed he's not going to mention that.

“You’re still spending the night Tuesday night, right? Christopher is a little panicked about the new school year. He’s looking forward to both of us dropping him off. I think it’s the math class he has to take. All I know is when I was in school two plus two equaled four. Now they went and redid everything. I can’t even help my kid with his math homework.”

“Says the man that told a firehouse of people I don’t know math. I promised him pancakes. You know I can’t break a promise to him.”

“A year ago. How do you even remember that? Buck, you minored in education. They taught you new math before they changed the system.”

“Shhh, that was our secret man. It’s easy once you figure out the algorithm.”

“See, cool dad. What am I going to do when Miss Right comes along and takes you from me?”

Bobby watches as Buck just taps Eddie’s shoulder with his, grinning at him with a “You’ll always have me, especially to remember everything you say.” Bobby doubts that Miss Right coming along to take him away is going to happen anytime in the next fifty years. Especially since Eddie is rubbing Buck’s leg making sure it’s really alright.


	2. Chapter 2

44 Days Ago

"Have I mentioned there is one thing I hate more than September rainstorms in Los Angeles?" Eddie asks as he and Buck are about to cut the windshield of a 1970’s Camaro to get to the child stuck inside. “August rainstorms.”

Buck is making silly faces, making the little girl laugh, talking in calm tones as he tells her what’s happening. Shes looks to be around three, brown hair and eyes. Picturing her as Eddie's daughter makes Buck all the more cautious. Its doubtful she understands him but she knows by the docile sound of his voice and the silly faces she’s safe. Buck got a name out of her then tells her his.

"I'm getting deja vu. Do you know what deja vu is sweet Tracey?" The little girl shakes her head no. Eyes wide as she looks at Buck like he has all the answers in the world. "It’s a feeling of when something has happened before happens again"

Her little mouth goes wide in an O shape like Buck just told her the secrets to the universe.

"Idiota parents leaving their kids in locked old cars with laminated glass that won’t break just so they can go shopping instead of putting an umbrella over their kid not to get wet. Better yet, keep them home. How they even got the car seat to properly fit I’m afraid to ask.”

Tracey starts to tear up. "Don’t worry baby girl. This is Eddie. He’s my friend. He just needs to work on his tone issues”.

“Friend.” She repeats.

“Thats right.” Buck says as they remove the windshield intact. They quickly worked with the glass cuter and crow bar to get the small child out, even though she was showing no signs of distress. At the moment. It could only take five precious minutes for that to change. Of course they had to come across an old modeled car with laminated glass. Buck knew exactly what THOSE Spanish words translate to. He’s heard them many a time from both his and Eddie’s kitchen while Eddie cooked and a certain little boy laughed.

Buck takes his helmet off and starts climbing inside telling her, “Help will be right there. Okay, sweetie. You’re being so good and brave. I’m so proud of you. You know. You haven’t told me your favorite zoo animal yet.” Buck lands in the front seat then he pops his head over it. “Well, hello there.” Wiggling his eye brows, making her giggle.

Little Tracey starts in on the fluffy white bears. “What are those fluffy white bears called?” Buck asks, trying to reach his thick frame back to where she is.

“Polar Bears!” Tracey squeals.

“Really? My little boy likes the giraffes.” Buck tells her as he takes his gloves off so he can unbuckle her car seat when he finally gets in a good position.

“How come?” She asks with the curiosity of a child wanting to learn.

“Because you can feed them, they also have a new baby they let out at certain times. Personally, I like the tigers. Especially the new white one.” Buck gets the last strap undone.

“Why?”

“Well, they’re fluffy, too, but mainly because they’re protective.”

Eddie tore his eyes from Buck’s ass when he heard the words “his little boy.” Making HIS heart do a flip in his chest.

“Tada!” Buck says after he removes her from the seat, unlocking the passenger side door and exits with her on his hip.

“Tada!” Tracey repeats throwing her chubby little arms in the air then around his neck. Buck rubs his nose against hers, getting another giggle.

“See that nice lady there? Her name is Hen and she just wants to look at you to make sure you’re okey dokey.” Buck tilts his head at Hen, standing in front of them smiling.

“Your friend, too?” Tracey asks.

“She’s my friend, too.” Buck says softly.

“Okey dokey!” Tracey replies as Buck hands her over to Hen and they walk over to the ambulance.

Eddie is putting the glass cutters away while Buck removes his jacket. He may be off the blood thinners but, glass.

Athena is on scene trying to find out which store the driver is in when a teenager starts yelling, “What the hell did you do to my brother-in-law’s car?”

Before Athena is there Buck is in her face telling her what could have happened to the little girl and asking why her first concern is her vehicle and not the child no longer inside. Athena lays her hand on his chest as she steps between the two, feeling his heart racing as it rapidly rises and falls.

“Come on. Let Athena do her job now.” Bobby says gently grabbing him by the elbow. “You did yours.”

He hears a screaming “Buc! Buc!”

Chimney runs over with a “She won’t calm down enough for us to examine her, Hen thinks she wants you.”

Buck opens one of the fire truck’s compartments to grab something out of it before calming himself and walking over to the ambulance.

“Did I hear my fair lady calling for me?” Buck bows to a crying Tracey.

“Buc.” Tracey reaches her arms to him with all the trust in the world, clinging to him with her arms around his neck. "Is it okay if I sit down right here with you. It would make me feel soooo much better if Miss Hen would be able to tell me you're okay." She just shakes her head and lays her head on his shoulder as he sits on the edge of the ambulance.

Hen is trying to listen to her heart when Tracey says “Fluffy.” Picking her head up off Buck’s shoulder and points at the teddy.

“Who? This guy? He's my friend.” Buck says holding up the teddy bear.

“White fluffy.” He gently shifts her to his knee so she can get a better look at the bear and Hen now has better access to her.

“Yeah, he’s white and fluffy like the bears you like at the zoo but unfortunately he doesn’t have a name. Would you like to help me with that?” Buck asks her

“Buc.”

“You need something, sweetheart?”

“No,” Tracey says pointing to the bear. “Name is Buc.” She says authoritatively.

“You think his name should be Buck? That's an honor. Would you do me a favor? He's a good friend of mine but I can’t keep him company like he needs. Do you think you can do that for me?”

Tracey shakes her head yes as Buck hands her the teddy and she hugs him tight to her chest.

By then the teenager, turns out to be her aunt, has walked over visibly shaken. Athena has already put a call in to the mom at work.

Buck hands her over as Hen explains she’s a bit dehydrated but luckily not overheated, they would like to take her to the Emergency Room as a precaution.

“Auntie, friend.” Tracey exclaims as she holds up the bear. “Buc.”

“You got a new friend?” The young girl asks, pointing at the teddy bear.

Tracey shakes her head yes and points to Bucks chest. “Buc friend. He saved me Auntie! It was scary.”

Eddie is standing back watching the scene in front of him as the young girl gently brushes the toddler’s cheek with her finger tip. He can hear Buck apologizing but she stops him and says thank you, she needed to be put in her place and reminded what her priorities should be. Eddie stands there wondering what Buck would look like holding a little girl with brown hair and eyes but instead of calling him friend she’s calling him daddy.

He feels a hand squeezing his shoulder. Turning his head he sees Bobby. Shaking his head as if his daydream is playing out like a movie in his eyes.

Athena walks up, “Sometimes I swear that boy should have joined the police academy. She was begging me for forgiveness, to take her license and swearing she didn’t know what could happen. Take her to jail, just let her little niece be okay.”

“You should have seen him with the asshole English teacher Christopher had last year. Needless to say he no longer works at a school for special needs children.” Eddie murmurs, the words his little boy still ringing in his ears.

“I sense a story.” Athena quirks an eyebrow.

“Oh, there’s a story alright.” Bobby shares a look with Athena as Eddies smiles. “Christopher was quiet all week after school. When we got home after shift Buck would do everything to get him to smile.” Athena looks at Bobby mouthing “we.” Bobby pinches the bridge of his nose, picturing which storage closet would be just the right size. Then makes a mental note to schedule an appointment with his doctor to get his blood pressure checked as soon as they get back to the station. Maybe they can squeeze him in tomorrow morning.

Eddie pretty much admitted he sees them as living together.

“Then that weekend, on our day off, Buck wanted to take Christopher into this old bookstore we were passing by on our way back from the park as his award for gold stars all week but Chris just cried and refused so we went home. That’s when Buck called Carla and she told him he had gold stars in every subject but English. He wouldn’t tell her why. Buck blames himself too but it’s my responsibility, no matter how hell of a week it had been, to check on my son and his education.” Eddie lets out a sigh.

“Turns out our use of Spanish started running over into his school work. The teacher embarrassed Christopher in front of the class when he accidentally answered a question in Spanish. Told him his family needed to migrate back to where they belong since we were most likely here illegal anyway, so that a real student that would actually be able to do the assigned work could use the scholarship he was wasting. That was when I called you, Bobby, and asked you if I could come in late Monday.”

“I remember that. You said you needed to meet with the school director. I called Buck to cover for you since he was coming in late but he said he had an important appointment he really needed to go to but he would be in as soon as he had it taken care of. I thought it was about his blood thinners. He didn’t say that but when he said important, what could be more important than that?” Bobby ignores his wife’s scoff and quiet “You really don’t know Buck.”

“Turns out Christopher is. He bypassed the Director of the school all together and went to the source. By the time I got down there with her Buck had the man pale and pissing his pants. Unlike the teacher though, he gave him the dignity of dressing him down in private. Don’t worry Buck didn’t touch him. When we walked in he was standing ten feet away looking like one of my old drill Sargents with his arms crossed, legs straight and spread like he was about to tell the man to drop and give him fifty. Muscles showing. I swear he wore one of my short sleeve shirts and pair of pants on purpose because they’re smaller and define his muscles more. Buck never told me what he said to the guy but he was stammering an apology to me and the Director.

But Buck. He had the most quiet voice when he said he was apologizing to the wrong Diaz and he expected to have him to not only do it in writing but in Spanish. I have no clue where he had it but he tossed a Spanish/English dictionary from where he was standing and it landed perfectly on the teacher’s desk. Then he just gave me a smile on the way out with a squeeze on the shoulder telling me he’d see me at work as soon as I could get there then told Maria to have a good day and her tamales recipe turned out fantastically.”

Athena clears her throat. “Did the teacher…?”

“Write a very lengthy apology letter in Spanish to my son? Yes, yes, he did.” Eddie had a far away look in his eyes.

“Boy may act the part of dumb but like I said, police academy.”

Bobby taps his wife’s waist. “Yeah but then we wouldn’t have that on our team.” Bobby tells her tilting his head towards the ambulance as they both watch Buck make the little girl holding on tight to her new white teddy friend screech with laughter as he tickles her to distract her from Hen putting in an I.V. line as he holds her little arm still.

“Point taken.” Athena murmurs.

The three of them are getting in the truck when a blonde woman that looks like an older version of the teenager comes running up to them.

“Excuse me! Wait. Thank you. I'm Helena, Tracey's mom and sister of a very irresponsible teenager.”

“Just doing our job, ma’am.” Bobby replies.

“No. You don’t understand. This is the most Tracey has talked in over six months since her dad died.” She turns to Eddie, “Thank you so much, Buck, you got her talking. I don’t know if its because you look like her daddy...”

“No ma’am. I’m Eddie. This is Buck.” Eddie says turning to his partner, brushing his shoulder with his.

“Huh. You’re the exact opposite of her daddy. Interesting. She would like to know if Buck can go with her.” She looks between the three.

“It’s okay ma’am. The bear is hers to keep.” Buck politely tells her.

“No, she wants you.”

Buck turns and looks at Bobby. “Just to keep her calm.” Bobby gestures with his head towards the ambulance. “We’ll see you back at the station.”

“By the way. She wants to know if she can go feed the giraffes and see the baby? Do any of you know what that means?” Helena asks as Buck’s face turns red.

Eddie is wearing a stupid dopey smile on his own face the whole way back to the station as he looks out the window that Bobby refrains from remarking on. He's both glad and proud to know a once rookie that didn’t get it and that he let Buck talk him into keeping a stash of stuffed animals in the truck. Of course when he showed up one day with five bags filled to the brim of them with a, “But Bobby, they’re just little kids that could use some comfort and we have that whole empty compartment going to waste.”

How could he say no to that?

43 Days Ago

“Yes, you have.” Buck sighs.

“Have what?” Eddie asks with a frown.

“Mentioned that there is one thing you hate more than September rainstorms in Los Angeles, August ones. Could be worse. At least that mudslide is out of our jurisdiction.” Buck says as he jumps over what used to be the hood of a Buick.

“I think I might actually take a mudslide over idiot drivers.” Eddie holds his arms out in reflex catching Buck around his waist with his hands as his feet land on the ground.

“What? You feeling the need to get a little dirty there, Edmundo?” Buck asks with a raised eyebrow and a smirk.

One Eddie returns with a half smile and a small laugh. “You couldn’t handle me dirty, Evan.”

They just got done with a five car pile up. Buck coming back from putting away the fire extinguisher that put out one of the cars on fire in the truck marking it to be refilled. The midmorning pile-up taking up most of their day and shift that is almost over with.

Six with minimum injuries, no casualties. It’s an ugly scene and by the looks of it you would think a mass casualty accident. Luck was on somebody’s side today.

Eddie tosses his gloves at him playfully. “Healthy food tonight. Chris needs to be in bed by eight-thirty. First bell is at 7:15.”

“7:15? Are they educating children or are they trying for a zombie apocalypse?” Bucks yelps.”I already have the Lasagna made and the veggies cut and marinading all we have to do is put it all in the oven when we get home.”

“Is that why you weren’t in bed when I woke up and already making breakfast? What time did you get up?”

“5, practice run for tomorrow morning. Damn.”

“What’s the matter?”

“Phone isn’t working.”

“We’ll stop by the store on the way home. See if they can fix it.”

Chim suddenly stops his movements and turns to Hen who only rolls her eyes at him when he mouths “we” “home” and “bed” at her.

“Harry's homeroom is 7.” Athena puffs out, clipboard in hand as she signs off on the witness statements.

“Denny's is too.” Hen adds. “Buckaroo, I love you but if I hear about that damn lunchbox one more time.”

“Yeah but they’re junior high. Chris is still in elementary school. A special needs elementary school at that. I already know from last year the pile of homework will be even bigger this year. How do they expect these kids to function if they have to stay up half the night doing homework then be at school at the butt ass crack of dawn? And he loves it. Christopher has a habit of talking nonstop about things he loves.”

“Eddie, your significant co-parent, cool dad, is about to go off on the school system.” Hen jokes, adding “Which one of you two does he get the chatter bug from?”

Eddie rolls his eyes. “Please don’t get him started again. He spent five days last week on Christopher's science curriculum. I swear I’m changing the password so he can’t get on his school report site.”

“Three science projects a semester, Eddie. Three.” Buck fumes. “Besides, you already tried that last year. I had the new password figured out in two minutes and then I listened to you bitch about sleeping on the couch for two days.”

“You kicked me out of _BED_ at _The HOUSE._ Besides, Mrs. Callahan didn’t seem all that bad when we met her last week at the meet and greet.”

_“_ Should have thought about that before you told me all I do is nag about shit. Something seems a bit off about her though.”

“I didn’t say you nag about shit. I simply stated you get a bit overly obsessive when it comes to Christopher’s education and you shouldn’t call teachers names because they give him a B instead of an A on a book report he proudly did all by himself just because he misplaced a few commas because you said we need to let him learn and proofread on his own. Even though I know you so totally snuck it out of his backpack and read it.”

Athena just pats Eddie on the back as Buck stands there looking at him one hand on his cocked hip, lips in a thin line.

“Okay maybe I did use the words nag and shit.” Eddie admits.

“Two words. English teacher. Not repeating his asshole move.”

Bobby, Athena, Chim or Hen don't comment that Eddie didn't correct Hen on her significant other crack or on their continued back and forth about said book report. They sure didn’t say a peep about Buck kicking Eddie out of bed at the house without the use of the word my.

When it came to Buck saying he spends the night at Eddie's house anyway revealing he is not a cover hog and wondering if he should go ahead and break his lease since he practically lives there making Chim slip and facepalm the ground at that remark, well Chim will never admit to why he slipped. They ignore Eddie's response that it takes a search and rescue team to find him under the covers.

The comment about the ficus enjoying the sunlight at Eddie’s compared to Buck’s apartment has Athena rolling her eyes and walking away after throwing her hands up in the air.

Bobby swears he’s going to get a second opinion because the doctor this morning said he’s fine. Blood pressure is perfect. Heart sounds great. They sure don’t say anything when Buck makes a comment that he already has most if his clothes at Eddie's house anyway so there’s no need to go by his place since they brought his truck this morning.

They just go with it waiting for the day that their two resident oblivious in love pseudo sons and brothers realize they’re basically in a common law marriage.

Okay.

There is no basically about it, Bobby admits to himself.

They’re in a common law marriage.

That they don’t know about.

That’s giving him heart burn.

42 Days Ago

Christopher. He needs to find Christopher. All the alarms are going off. He promised Christopher he’d be right back.

Buck opens his eyes to the blaring of the alarm clock. He was dreaming about something important but it’s faded away, his brain unable to retrieve it.

“Waking up at 5am to get your kid ready for school should be against the law.” Buck mutters laying on his back after turning the alarm off, covering his forehead with his forearm. "Can’t we extend summer vacation by one day? I think we should. Let him have one one more day of vacay.”

“He’ll still be in the third grade if he goes tomorrow. What gives?”

“I don’t know. He should just stay home today. We can call in.”

“You haven’t called in since you got back almost a year ago. Plus, Bobby will be pissed.”

“I’ll risk it.” Buck just lays there with a soft yet serious tone in his voice. “Edmundo, I think we should all stay home today.”

"Okay cool dad. You call Carla at 5am and tell her she has to deal with a pouting Christopher all day because he got kept home from school because you got first day jitters.” Eddie mumbles into the side of Bucks’s pillow on his stomach not moving since waking. “Besides we have to work today to save our sick days for when we actually need them so its not like we can spend it with him. Somebody has to be the responsible dad here after all" Eddie says as he leans up on one elbow patting Buck’s t-shirt covered stomach trying to keep his eyes off the tiny strip if skin showing between shirt and shorts.

Eddie takes in closed eyes, his arm covering his forehead and pouting mouth as he mumbles sleepily about “sistema escolar jodido.” How easy it would be to lean over and kiss him awake. Instead he jokes away his desire because that’s what he does. “You kiss my son and Abuela with that mouth, Evan? Come on, I have a feeling we’re about to be….”

“Dad! Buck! It’s the first day of school” A wide awake Christopher bounces into the room, using his crutches to jump up on the bed, accidentally hitting Buck’s sore leg making Eddie wince.

Buck, the ever patient one, doesn’t let him know it hurt as he takes said crutches and leans them against the bed. Eddie saw the wince though. Damn rain. “Somebody’s excited for a new school year.” Eddie teases Christopher as he cuddles him up against him.

“Hey, house rules, no leaving anyone out on the bed cuddles. You excited, Superman?” Buck turns over onto his side as Chris lays between them on his back with both of them now on their sides facing him.

“I’m one year closer to get to be in the big kids part of my building.”

“You are?” When did that little preschooler grow up on him? Eddie wants to know. He’s dreading the day he blinks and he’s graduating high school.

“What’s the big kids part of your building?” Buck sends Eddie a wink that sends him into that wondering tailspin of we could be laying here with our little girl between us today, too.

“The big kids part of my building is for fourth and fifth graders!”

“You don’t want to hang out with the kindergarteners anymore?” Buck fakes surprise.

“No, silly. They’re in the little building. I’m still in the second and third graders building like last year.”

“What’s so special about the fourth and fifth graders then? You trying to grow up on me before I get that college tuition ready?” Eddie asks.

“They’re _upstairs_. Not as close to the entrance of the main building as my rooms.” Christopher says in awe.

Buck and Eddie share a glance. “I know I’ll have to take the elevator but _upstairs_ dad.” Christopher’s eyes are as wide as saucers.

“I don’t know. We’re going to have to renegotiate the allowance to chores ratio if you’re going to be upstairs next year.”

Christopher thinks for a moment then nods his head. “Agreed.” Eddie is as always in awe of his independent little man.

“Pancakes! Buck promised pancakes.” Christopher exclaims as he crawls over Buck, grabbing his crutches.

“That I did.” Buck says rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He watches Christopher leave the room. “You know damn well I already have a college fund set up.”

“I’m debating on asking how you got the money.” Eddie mumbles from turning back over with his face buried in Buck’s pillow.

“Nope. Not happening. I’m up, you’re up.” Buck says grabbing Eddie by the back of his shirt. “Allow me to seduce you out of bed with coffee that I smell brewing because I had the good sense to go behind someone to make sure the timer is set.”

“You always make sure the timer is set.” Eddie says sitting up on the side of the bed by Buck.

Buck rubs the back of Eddie’s neck with his hand. “Well, you have one thing going for you today.”

“Mmmm, what’s that?”

“It’s not raining.” Buck squeezes his shoulder and gets up from the bed. Eddie watches as he leaves wondering what it would be like to get seduced out of bed by kisses with that exit instead of coffee and when he’d get the balls to admit he wanted it every morning to someone other than himself.

Preferably to the man that just left his bed.

“You excited back there, Superman?” Buck asks from the driver’s seat of his Jeep. Looking in the rear view mirror as Christopher is running his fingers over his lunchbox.

“I think he’s more excited about showing off that lunchbox than actually going to class.” Eddie murmurs from the passenger seat. “You ready to meet some new friends? I saw some of your old classmates listed but there are a lot of new names, too. Is that making you nervous?”

“No.” Christopher quietly answers from the backseat. Buck and Eddie exchange yet another glance. One of many since getting in the Jeep.

“Were my pancakes that bad this morning, Superman?” Buck asks.

Another quiet “no.”

Buck pulls over, stoping the Jeep. The car passing them flipping him off as it speeds past. “Nice influence on your kid.” Buck mutters.

Both Eddie and Buck turn around.”Okay, this is not the kid that jumped in bed, waking us up this morning because he’s one grade closer to being upstairs with the big kids. Spill.” Eddie’s father voice comes in play.

They watch as Christopher keeps running his fingers over the lunchbox. “It’s a school night. You have a late shift. I won’t get to tell Buck about my first day.”

“You get to tell me all about it.” Eddie replies.

“Yeah but Buck won’t be there.” Christopher says softly.

Eddie turns to Buck starring at him with a “My son likes you better than me, Evan” look.

“He does not, Edmundo. Grow up and stop pouting.” Buck’s eyes say back

“This is what I get for letting you be the cool dad.” 

“I like it when I get to tell you both together.” Christopher finishes.

And with that the silent argument turns into an ah-ha moment.

“Well, you are driving us to work you might as well stay for a bed time story.” Eddie’s eyes communicate.

“I’m going to be hungry, as long as you feed me after we get him to sleep.” Buck returns.

“Ah, I gotta eat too.”

“Leftover Lasagna and some Netflix?”

“Might as well. We have tomorrow off anyway. You can sleep in after you go home.”

“Or I could just spend the night again.”

“You’re always welcome to spend the night.”

“Even though I hog the covers?” Buck’s eyebrow goes up.

“How come you’re being so quiet and looking at each other?” Christopher asks making the two break eye contact and turn back around to him.

Because your parents just made a date night without saying a word, kiddo, Eddie thinks to himself. Nope. No. Don’t go there, Diaz. He feels a light squeeze on his knee. Turning his head to see Buck’s hand there.

“Hey Buddy, Buck has to drive me home after work. We’re in his Jeep.” Eddie tells him, looking back at him trying to ignore the heat coursing through his body starting at his knee.

“Yeah, ya silly goose. I thought you knew me better than to make your dad walk home.” Buck jokes.

“You’ll both be there tonight?” Christopher’s face lights up like a Christmas tree.

“Christopher, I’ll always be there. In the morning, too. How does western omelettes sound for breakfast?” Buck asks.

“You know there’s this thing called cereal.” Eddie murmurs.

“Kids have a better day and absorb what they’re being taught better after a good breakfast.” Buck murmurs back.

“5 a.m.” Eddie reminds him.

“Worth it.” Buck returns as he starts the Jeep up, pulling back into traffic both while listening to a chattering Christopher the rest of the way to school. So much better than any radio station. “Besides we can take a nap after we drop him off.”

“Okay but if you keep it up you’re going to have to move in just to cook.” Eddie says before thinking about what he’s implying.

“That an invite, Edmundo?” Buck asks with a smirk and a knee tap against Eddie’s.

“What happened to you might as well go ahead and break your lease since you practically live at the house, Evan?”

“Waiting for you to say the word.”

“Watch the traffic.” Eddie taps his knee back.

“Hey, Carl.” Buck walks up to the bulked up black man, with a buzz cut similar to theirs, greeting the ex marine turned school security guard.

The courtyard is bustling with kids, parents and buses.

“Buck, Eddie, long time. Hey Christopher, how was your summer?”

Christopher’s eye got wide as he started talking, “We saw the animatronic dinosaurs at the Museum of Science, we went to the zoo a lot, they have a new white tiger the giraffes had a baby but we couldn’t see him until July, and we also took a road trip up where we ended up in the dessert and camped there! Buck even wrangled a snake!”

“Camping in the dessert. Sounds adventurous.” Carl says genuinely interested.

Buck shakes his hand, “How was your summer, you didn’t send us any photos when Tabitha was due. Everything okay?”

“Girl number five. Tabby was hoping for a boy but I gotta tell you, Buck. I wouldn’t trade those little girls for anything. Sorry about the no photos but five now, keeps, ya busy.”

“Hello, Diaz clan.” The school director, Mrs. Martinez a woman that reminds Buck if Eddie’s mother with more gray than brown hair worn down today and blue eyes walks up greeting them. Buck kisses both her cheeks as Eddie hugs her. She gives Christopher a quick hug.

“I know you have a lot of families to greet but how did Bela make it off to Haiti?”

“Doing greet and is loving it. Me sending my daughter and only child off to a foreign country for a missionary trip on the other hand. I’m sorry I have to keep it short. Thank you for asking and remind me to email you an update. She sent me some photos of the new houses she helped build. I still hate you for suggesting it since she didn’t want to go to college.”

“She’ll find her way. She just has to figure out who she is.”

“Ugh. I hate you’re so friggin smart. Melissa should by any minute. You met all of Christopher’s teachers at the meet and greet? I hated I didn’t get to see you.”

“We did. All very polite and took to Christopher like new best friends.” Eddie tells her

“Buck?” She asks with a raised eyebrow. He’s the more…. upfront of the two when it comes to Christopher’s education. Not that Eddie doesn’t question why something in particular is being done with him. It’s just that, well, Buck is Buck. She was going to fire that English teacher anyway due to the amount of complaints. Buck, well. At least the teacher learned something on his way out and made her want to find him a job here.

“They’re perfect. Still a bit skeptical about the science teacher.”

“Buck.” Eddie starts.

“Oh?”

“Three science projects a semester, really? That’s twelve in one entire school year.”

“That is more than a bit much for a third grader and our curriculum. I don’t remember signing off on that. He has Mrs. Callahan, her daughter died last year, killed herself; used to come here, high school. She’s very well liked but hasn’t been the same since. She must have changed it after sending me her syllabus. Thank you for bringing it to my attention. That doesn’t fly here. I’ll talk to her” Mrs. Martinez says as she walks away to greet another family after giving Buck another kiss in the cheek.

“Thanks, Maria.” Buck calls after her. “Yeah, I’m an ass. What?” Buck asks Eddie.

“I said nothing.” Eddie says with pursed lips and squinted eyes.

“You have a look. See, all you have to do is mention a concern and it’ll be addressed. Even when it makes you an ass.”

“You have the staff wrapped around your pinky. At least let him get to know his teachers, us know his teachers. Give her a chance to see what her students can do. You’re always telling me to let him be more challenged with his school work.”

Buck just shrugs. “They’re likable. Twelve science projects in one year by her layout would have frustrated and shut him down. Four, yeah. That would have pumped and jazzed him. Twelve would have overloaded him. I wonder if she’s been talking to someone, I can’t imagine how she feels even now. To be a parent and not have a child to be a parent to. Yeah, I’m a total ass. Maybe she feels like she didn’t challenge her daughter enough.”

“You are aware I know what my son can do and out of curiosity on a scale of one to ten how much of an ass are you feeling like right now? For future argument purposes.”

“Oh, so today he’s your son. During the finger paint incident in art class last year he got to be my son. Level I’m sending her a dozen roses every Monday all year.”

“I’m waiting for when she asks you to be the president of the PTA. I don’t even get that level. Here comes Melissa.”

A middle aged woman with brown hair up in a bun and wearing a blue skirt and blouse with tan heels, Christopher’s personal guidance counselor, is walking toward them. One of many the school has so the students get the attention they need, especially the ones like Christopher’s case. Walking beside her, holding her hand, a girl Christopher’s age, with white hair wearing a light longer sleeve shirt, skirt, pink glasses with thicker lenses than Christopher’s with a slight tint to them hiding light violet eyes and a pink strap attached to them instead of orange .

“Okay. Lunchbox?” Eddie asks as he and Buck kneel in front of Christopher.

“Check.” Christopher nods his head holding up his custom made fire engine lunchbox with one crutch arm as he leans on the other before attaching the special made handle to said crutch.

“Backpack full of cool new school supplies that someone went overboard on?” Eddie side eyes Buck who just rolls his eyes at him in a “it’s not like he’s not going need it” gesture.

“Check.”

“Awesome I’m going to nail the third grade attitude?” Buck asks from the other side of Christopher.

“Check.”

“Remember, my phone broke during a call yesterday even though it’ll be fixed this morning I can’t get it until tonight, so if you need anything call dad.” Buck reminds him.

“Check.”

“Okay, Melissa is going to help you to your locker. Plus, she’s going to introduce you to your new school buddy.” Eddie assures him.

“Just like last year and the year before.” Christopher nods.

“Good morning Christopher, Buck, Eddie. This is Emily. She’s your school buddy for the school year. She’s in all your classes. This is her very first day here. I was hoping you could show her around and help her get to know the school. I hope you two get to know each other very well.” Melissa introduces the two after she approaches and greets them.

According to Melissa’s email Emily is considered legally blind due to albinism but is fully capable of being Christopher’s school buddy. They both sat Christopher down explaining to him Emily is new to the school and exactly what albinism is. His response had been “She’s unique and I need to watch over her like she will me and make sure nobody bullies her. I got it handled.”

“Think of her as your Lois Lane. Superman always keeps his Lois Lane safe. Just like Lois Lane watches out for Superman. They always have each other’s backs.” Buck had told him.

“Emily, these are Christopher’s dads.” Yeah, they just found it easier to stop correcting people about a year ago and just roll with it. At least that’s what they told Hen when she stared at them when they didn’t correct a mom of one of his classmates the first time in front of everyone. Athena had said something about Egypt and the Nile river as she walked away. Eddie couldn’t remember what else she said, he was busy corralling kids on an ice cream sugar high from drowning.

“Nice to meet you Emily, I’m Eddie and this is Buck.” Eddie says as the two remain kneeling.

Emily answers with a shy. “Hi.”

Christopher on the other hand leans on one crutch and sticks his hand out “I’m Christopher but you can call me Chris.” He tells her with a dopey smile and **_the eyes_** that he normally reserves to get what he wants.

Emily smiles with a shy “Hi, Chris,” and a giggle as she shakes his hand.

“Hey, Melissa.” Both Eddie and Buck greet her. She just smiles down at them.

“So, big third grader now. I guess its not cool to hug your dad bye anymore. What you think Buck? Will he make us start dropping him off down the block next year?”

“Just group hug already and enjoy me being in third grade before you start crying over me graduating high school again.” Christopher deadpans.

The three of them give one big group hug. Eddie and Buck landing a kiss on each of Christopher’s cheeks. Then they watch him walk away with Melissa and Emily. “The smart mouth, definitely comes from you.” Eddie deadpans as they turn around, hands brushing.

They turn back when they hear a “Dad! Buck!” to see Christopher trotting towards them, hugging their legs with a “Love you.”

“Love you.” They both murmur as they each ruffle his head. They watch him go back to a waiting Emily hearing her say “that was so sweet.” With Christopher returning a “I have extra cool new notebooks if you need a spare and we have this cute Tabby cat that hangs around that’s really sweet.”

Eddie turns his head and looks at Buck. “Yeah, yeah. I know. Gets it from me.” Buck says bumping Eddies shoulder. They start walking back to the Jeep.

“You turned your son into a player and he’s not even in double digits yet.” Eddie says as he opens the door.

“ _NOW_ he’s my son?” Buck asks getting behind the wheel.

Eddie just gives him the Diaz eye roll. “Apparently he has game with the ladies Mr. think of her as Lois Lane. I now dread him being a teenager even more.”

“Works on you.” Buck smirks at him. “Edmundo, our Christopher has his first crush.” Buck grins at him before pulling out onto the side road.

Eddie lets out a small laugh. “Take us to work, ya dork. Try not to plan the wedding just yet, Evan.”

Buck is sitting quietly on the bench in the locker room sudden chills going through his body as he watches the clock in the wall, it’s 7:30. Christopher should be settled in, about to leave home room and heading to Science class until 8:30. He has one booted foot propped up in front of him as he sits there frozen with it halfway tied, when Bobby pops his head in. “You planning on joining us sometime today? You know write reports, polish trucks, do inventory, maybe save a life. The family business. That would be kind of nice.”

“Bobby. Have you ever gotten the sudden feeling something bad is going to happen?” Bobby’s annoyed face softens. “Well, we are firefighters. It’s first day of school parent jitters. Eddie is upstairs suddenly having them. Athena already called me. Hen is the only one cool as a cucumber. It’ll pass. Come on let’s have some team time before a call comes in.” Buck finishes tying his boot and follows Bobby up the stairs, rubbing Eddie up and down his back then messaging his neck when he sees him running a hand through his hair.

  
  


It’s quiet. Too quiet. As in they should have had at least one call by now quiet. Even Maddie calls to say she’s feeling eerie because the only call she’s gotten so far was about a dog stuck in his owner’s fence and the neighbor worried it was going to break his neck. Maddie had asked if they had access to a shovel and were capable of digging a hole for the dog, she could hear in the background from the speaker phone “Why didn’t we think of that?” She had simply replied “panicking is a natural human response.”

It’s quiet. It’s almost as if the Universe is keeping them on the ready quiet which is making everyone fidgety.

That feeling something bad is going to happen has only intensified in both Buck and Eddie as they inventory the trucks. Hen and Chim keeping a close eye on them after they add extra supplies to an already full inventory fleet. Then suddenly start adding extra stock to the ambulance.

It’s almost like a calm before a storm or in their past experiences an earthquake or Tsunami.

When the alarm does go off at 8: 32am before everyone heads to the trucks Bobby stops them “We have a 4As at an elementary school. Be sharp. Be safe. Full gear. Get a move on.”

Eddie hears a rookie ask what a 4As is with Buck responding “Awareness, Avoidance, Arm and Attack. There’s an active shooter.” He’s in the truck in full gear leaving the rookie trying to catch up with Eddie and Bobby hot on his heels.

As they’re riding along the words elementary school hits Buck in the stomach like a punch to the gut. Looking out the window he notices the familiar roads. “Cap. Cap. What school?”

“Just be ready to do your job, Buck.” Bobby says emotionless.

“Cap?!” You can hear panic in Eddie’s voice. “Eddie, we have jobs to do.”

“BOBBY! What school?” Buck yells.

He doesn’t need an answer. They just pulled up in front of Christopher’s school.


	3. Chapter 3

They're grabbing for Eddie as soon as the truck stops and he's out the door.

He's yelling Christopher's name as Bobby, Chim and Hen pin him against the truck.

Buck just stands there quiet as Bobby talks to Eddie, Athena jogging over.

"Eddie. Eddie look at me. We need you to be a firefighter right now, not a dad. We wait while S.W.A.T. sets up a tactical...."

Gun shots go off followed by an explosion and screams come from inside the building. Everyone takes cover as Athena explains "The call came in around 8:31. Threw grenades into the front entrance. It's a mess. LAPD is setting up a command center. So far the shots heard are not from a semi-automatic rifle. They're thinking hunting rifles and or hand guns."

"Christopher, Christopher's classes are in the front of the main building." Eddie chokes out.

A black, bald man in S.W.A.T gear approaches them. “Captain Nash. My name is Hondo. My team is working on a plan for the best tactical entrance and get the scene cleared. It’s taking a bit longer than expected. You're the first fire/rescue to arrive on scene. We don't know about casualties or injuries at this point. We believe there are two gunmen with live grenades, shotguns not automatic rifles and handguns as weapons confirmed by the 911 caller. Motives at this time are unknown. You know your part in this?"

"Stay out of the way until the scene is cleared and we are able to get inside to retrieve the injured."

"Good. We're going to need....what the hell?" Hondo mutters. He takes out his radio. "We need confirmation of a third suspect. I see no weapons. Suspect has his back to the outer wall, hugging it like we would. He’s a white male, with dirty blond hair buzz cut, an armband tattoo on his right arm under his elbow, looks to be a little over six feet, heavy built, wearing navy slacks with a belt, boots and a dark blue t-shirt with a yellow emblem on the left pectoral that says…...” Hondo drops his radio to his side, face ashen. “Wait…..is that a LAFD uniform?”

"Ah, Bobby." Athena speaks up looking around, face an emotional roller coaster. "Where's Buck?"

Hen pulls on the partially open side door. "Cap." She whimpers. Chim is standing there holding Buck's helmet, jacket and yellow pants.

"Someone want to tell me what the hell is going on here?" Hondo demands.

"Yeah." Bobby says. "We were so worried about keeping the ex-Army dad from running in there we forgot about the Navy Seal."

"Navy Seal?" Hondo shakes his head. "Nobody can be that dumb to go into an active shooter facility with no weapon."

The four voices of Hen, Chim, Athena and Bobby chime together in a chorus of perfect union "You really don't know Buck."

"Shit." Hondo gets on the radio running back to base. "Friendly in line of fire. I repeat. Friendly in line of fire."

**“Evan!”** Eddie screams before sliding down the side of the fire engine to the ground.

"Buck you idiot. What are you thinking?" Bobby utters running his hand over his face, throwing his helmet on the ground.

Athena lays her hand on his arm as more shots come from inside, another explosion, looking over at Eddie sitting on the ground, hands behind his head, head between his knees. "The same thing you would if this were Harry’s school. That their son is in there." She says laying her forehead on Bobby’s shoulder as Hen and Chim just stand there, not knowing what to do other than cry.

Hen taps Chim on his arm gesturing her head towards a van. He pulls out his phone when he sees the news van that had been sitting there unnoticed. Maddie is hearing it from him this time unlike the ladder truck where she had to find out on the news. It’s bad enough she’s going to have to watch it.

“Hello?”

“Maddie, baby. I need you to listen to me.”

“I didn’t get the call. It’s Christopher’s school isn’t it?” Her voice wobbles.

“It is. The news vans are showing up. They’re already filming. You’re going to see something.” He tries to keep his voice calm and the tears out of it.

“What has my brother done now?” She calmly cries.

.

Buck is standing there looking at the gaping hole that earlier this morning they dropped Christopher off at. He remembers the earthquake and telling Eddie he's at the safest place he can be. He remembers rushing water and telling him he'll always keep him safe. He remembers this morning saying he'll always be there. He remembers talking to Carl, Maria and Melissa then Christopher with a dopey grin as he meets his first girl crush and something in him clicks.

A switch is flipped that kept him from continuing Navy Seal training. A switch is flipped of “that’s my son in there I promised to always keep safe.”

**_The Switch_** is flipped.

As Athena talks to the team he opens the fire truck door, leaving it ajar. He takes off his helmet and gear, tossing it on the floor. He looks around the truck, grabs three paper clips and their driver Nathan’s lucky troll doll. Slipping out the other side he slowly and tactically makes his way to the front of the building as he straightens the paper clips. Hugging the side as shot after shot rings out. He takes note of fire exits. The stairs leading down from each classroom upstairs.

He can hear someone scream his name as he enters ground zero, the blast zone. Body against the wall. Edmundo, I’ll bring him back to you.

The first thing he sees is the resident gray and white cat, missing the lower half of her body. Looking like she became a mother over the Summer if the smaller limbs around her is any indication.

Upon entering it looks wrong. Like the blast came from the inside not out. The doors are gone. What concrete is left is littering the ground. Steel beams are pointed out towards the street. It looks like an exit wound with the cement leading the entrance cracked.

The overwhelming smell of blood, gun powder and smoke hits him, registers in his brain.

He’s met at the entryway with Carl on the ground missing the right half of his body.

“You have a good Summer, man.” Buck said with a one arm hug to Carl and a pat on the back. “Better get pictures when that little one gets here.”

“I got your number, man. I appreciate you getting that drink with me, listening to me let off some steam. We need to do that again.”

“I was never in the service or a dad but I get feeling overwhelmed. Besides, you and Tabitha raised smart kids. Gina is sixteen, you got to trust her and trust the values you put in her that way she trusts you enough to feel like she can come talk to you.”

“The father in me tells me you speak from experience but I’ll keep the opinion forming to myself and Buck, you’re one of the best dads I know.” Carl had said gesturing with his chin towards Christopher and Eddie. “If I get too busy this Summer with the new baby, don’t take it personally.”

“It’s life, Carl. Take care of that family.”

“You do the same. If we don’t get together for that beer, see you the first day of school. It’ll be here before you know it.”

Buck keeps walking, staying close to the wall. There are little bodies scattered about. Bodies missing limbs with soulless eyes. Laying in pools of blood from bullets tearing through their small bodies.

Maria is on her back with a bullet between her eyes. Blood pooling under head, matted in her hair. He wants to close her eyes but knows he can’t touch the bodies. There are two tan trench coats next to her.

“Oh, Buck. I don’t know what to do with her.”

“She just graduated high school, Maria. Nobody knows who they are. A select few do but a majority lack life experiences, THAT ONE experience that changes them early in life, to know what they want. You said your church is sending missionaries to Haiti for six months. See if that’s something she’s interested in. Let her see how other people live. Let her make a difference. Let her go find herself.”

“I’m fifty-seven, Buck. She was my late in life baby. My only baby. It’s just been me and her since her dad died.”

“Maybe it’s time you let being a mom go and find yourself as well.”

“I hate you, you know that right. I’m not retiring until that little boy graduates just so I can say the same thing to you.”

Going into one room his finds the secretary, Carla a petite blonde haired blued eyed woman in her late twenties hiding behind a shelf, shaking, with another shelf turned over on her.

“Carla? LAFD. I’m a good guy. My name is Evan Buckley. Remember me? Christopher Diaz’s dad? I’m here to help. He has his own Carla that picks him up sometimes.” He says at her yelp holding up his hands. “Are you hurt?”

A nod yes. “Le…legs. Se…second exp…explo. Buck?”

“Hey. Yeah. It’s me, Buck. Second explosion hurt you?”

A nod yes.

He moves closer to her, moving another bookcase from a top her and looks to where her legs and pelvis used to be. Fuck. She doesn’t have long. The adrenaline is actually keeping her alive.

“Okay. Can you keep your eyes on me?”

A nod yes.

“Do you have your cell phone?”

She nods yes. “Ca…Call….Called 911.” Her voice shakes out.

“That was so very smart and brave of you. I know the students aren’t allowed but do the teachers have theirs?”

Another nod yes.

“Can you tell me what they look like?”

Another nod yes. “Tw..two of them. Heard explosions. Tried to hide. Call 911 then ‘nother explosion. Saw shotguns and handguns. Took jackets off. Lots of them. More gre…..grenades. Flannel shirts. Light blue jeans. Shorter than you. Come to you shoulders. Skinny. Both have brown hair. Didn’t see eyes? I think they’re green. Only met a few times. Jackets. Long. Tan, white males. Sister used to go here. Her brohers. John and Josh Callahan. Eighteen and nineteen. Mother is Science teacher, Mrs. Callahan. John blue. Josh red. Both white shirts underneath. Thought here to prise mom first day flowers.” Buck knows she’s talking backwards and mixed but he gets the idea.

“That was so good. Can you show me how to send out a mass text to the teachers?”

“I’ll do.” She whimpers.

“You don’t have to.”

Carla grabs Bucks arm. “Dying Buck. Let me save our babies, please.”

“Okay. Write it exactly like this for me, okay?”

She shakes her head yes as her shaking hands start typing on her phone.

“Remain where you are. _Help is coming_. _A fire alarm is going to go off. Remain calm to not scare the children and they remain calm. When it does take the students and anyone with them out the fire exit door single file. Especially upstairs. Share the plan with the students so they are ready and tell them there are people waiting to help. It is important they not panic. Do not go into the main entrance area. When exiting do so with arms and hands up if able. Have the children capable of helping help the ones that need it getting down the stairs that can’t. It is important that everyone stay out of the main entrance. As soon as you see a police officer, a member of the police force or fire/rescue tell them they need help. Be sure whomever they approach or approaches them are in a uniform or have a badge. If they feel uncomfortable with the person ask for their credentials._

Breathe for me.” Another shot as she flinches with a cry. “Just keep breathing.”

“Had a friend. Loved me. Were best friends. Loved me. Should have told told her back but sca…scared. You should tell him, Buck.”

“What’s that?” Looking at her dropped phone by her prone hand he sees she sent and texted everything word for word.

“Mr. Diaz. Eddie. Tell him you love him, too.”

“Carla? You with me? Carla?” Putting his fingers against her pulse. Nothing.

Buck picks up the phone, the battery is almost gone.

He sends his own text to the number he has memorized that knows will be most helpful.

_This is LAFD Evan Buckley of the 118. Captain is Robert Nash, married to Sgt. Athena Grant of the LAPD. Mother of May and Harry Grant. Ex wife to construction worker Michael Grant. Suspects are-John and Josh Callahan. 18 and 19 years of age. Sons of faculty member, third grade Science teacher Lila Callahan. Be on the look out for two white, tan, males. Brown hair. Green eyes. Both wearing light colored jeans. One in a red flannel/white shirt, other blue flannel/white shirt. Suspects are carrying shotguns and handguns. Unsure at this time if any more grenades are in play. Fire alarm going off soon. Every room has a fire door exit. Upstairs have fire doors with stairs on the outside. Children will need assistance._

_So far three adults and twenty children counted as casualties. Have found no injured survivors._

A chime. _Buck?!?_

_Hey, Athena. I kinda chased that waterfall._

_Are you safe? Get the hell out of there._

_Make sure there are identifying LAPD/LAFD at fire exits. Students will be exiting from fire exits doors with arms and hands up if able. There are also students that will be exiting stairwells that may need assistance. No students or faculty are coming out the main entrance. Have credentials ready to show if asked._

_Buck! Are you okay? Are you safe?_

The battery dies before he can answer her.

Buck takes one last look at Carla and thinks of her never ending, hyper chattering at lightening speed.

“Hey Buck! Here to pick up your cutie pie for his appointment? You’re early, as normal. I was going have him here for you already but I got busy, sooooo sorry. You really hit the jack pot with such a cute, kind young gentleman and he looks so much like you. It’s destiny Buck. You were meant to be his dad. Let me send a quick page to teacher and I’ll have him here in a jiffy. I know your time is valuable Mr. Fireman.” Her smiling face beaming back at him.

Stepping back out into the hallway he finds more little bodies in each room he searches. Along with a teacher in front of them. Call came in at 8:31. Classes changed at 8:30. They had a hallway of sitting ducks.

8:30. Christopher and Emily would be leaving Science class. The shooters mother’s class.

He really could use his cell phone right now to use as communication to the outside.

Buck follows the sounds of gunshots in the hallway until he sees **_IT_**.

His blood runs cold as that switch that’s been flipped pumps adrenaline into him.

A red fire engine lunch box is lying on the ground with a bullet hole in it.

He hears a voices of two men arguing in the room ahead. Mrs. Callahan lying dead right outside the door, as if she were trying to block it, with blood pooling out of her head.

They killed their own mother.

He looks inside to see one suspect in blue pointing a handgun at little Emily. He grabs the suspect in red from behind in a chokehold as he listens to the other man telling her to “cry harder you little freak”, as he shoves the gun closer to her. Buck can see her trembling.

Christopher is behind her with his arms around her. Superman protecting his Lois Lane.

Buck allows himself one second of relief before meeting his little boy's eyes. Quietly letting the body of the suspect in red slide down to the ground. Holding a finger to his lips. Christopher's face remains unchanged as Buck lands a strike to the side of the suspect’s in blue neck with the side of his hand as his other covers the weapon’s barrel. Yanking it upwards as the bullet goes through the palm if his hand. He sends a strike to suspect’s nose with the lower part of his hand then uses his legs to knock him down. Hearing a grunt as he hits his head.

"Go. Run and Hide. I'll find you. I promise." He yells at the two children. He drags the suspect out of the room after disarming and dismantling the handgun leaving the weapon behind and pulling the fire alarm. 

He's caught off guard by the other suspect and hits the ground on his stomach. Landing next to one of the kids that knows Christopher. Has been to each other’s houses for sleep overs. Dinners with parents. Justin. A flashback to Christopher’s pool party and the little boy laughing as he’s being dunked.

The back if his head is missing.

He turns onto his back doing a pelvic thrust and landing on his feet.

The bastards turned a sanctuary into a war zone. They don’t get names. They’re suspects now. They became suspects and lost their name the moment

By now everything is happening so quickly Buck sees no colors or can tell which is which. All his brain can register is must stop them. Promised Christopher to be back.

He is not in goofy Buck mode. He is no longer in fireman mode. He is in the reason he left the Navy Seals mode.

He’s a machine ready to fight and kill without remorse mode.

The adrenaline pumping through him is making his bleeding hand not a thought. As he lands on his feet he comes face to barrel with a shotgun not even registering who is holding it. He goes into a stare off with him as blue eyes meet green, he takes the troll doll out of his pocket. With a quick kick side swipe with his foot, Buck knocks him off his feet then grabs the slide before the gun can go off, blocking it, sticking the troll doll behind the trigger so it can’t go backwards.

With the barrel in hand he’s grabbed from behind. Pinning his shoulders and upper arms down.

Wrong move, dumbass.

With all the strength he can muster he swings the barrel of the rifle around sending the one gunman through the gaping hole that was once an entrance. He does a forward flip sending the other gunman flying into the courtyard.

Along with a live grenade shoved in his belt. It takes him five seconds to plug the pinhole with a straight paper clip and toss it away.

It was a distraction for them to start running.

Buck is faster and tackles them both to the cracked cement.

The one gunman turns around handgun at the ready as Buck takes it and disarms it in ten seconds. Out of his peripheral vision he sees the other gunman with a hunting knife coming at him.

He also sees the S.W.A.T team approaching. He grabs the man’s hand twisting it as he screams in pain until he hears the bones snap.

The other one comes at him once again grabbing him from behind as the first gunman rushes him with the knife in the non broken hand. His adrenaline pumping brain has yet to register the burning in his side.

He uses his upper body strength to lift his lower body up off the ground. Wrapping his legs around the one man’s neck until he passes out.

He pulls his head forward then with a swift movement he bashes the back of his head into the mans face hearing bones break. His vision blurs. Ears ringing.

The man falls backward passing out as Buck lands on top of both of them.

Five bodies are leaning against the 118 fire truck, four of which having been ordered to stand down for the time being. Athena needing to be by her husband for a few minutes as soon as she saw S.W.A.T. take position from a cleared of innocent life building. They were heading for the suspects. She should of known he’d hand deliver their evil asses to them.

“Did um?” Chim has a dumbfounded look in his face.

“Buck just disarm a live grenade, disarm a firearm in less than ten seconds and single handedly kick two armed men’s asses while unarmed himself. Yes, yes he did.” Hen answers him. If there is a bit of sisterly pride or a smirk on her face. Well, fuck it. She will also never bitch about how he takes his sweet time doing anything like ever again.

“Hey, Hen. Remind me not to piss off Buck.” Chim utters.

“I would start by not hurting or breaking up with his sister and making sure the wedding is all about her. Since he is about to be your brother-in-law.” Hen still has that smirk on her face.

“What am I going to do with that boy?” Athena mutters.

“It was smart, texting you.” Hen says.

“Nothing Evan Buckley did today was smart.” Bobby sounds pissy.

“Calm down, Bobby. That boy came up with a plan in less than a minute while LAPD had their heads up their asses.”

“Don’t even defend him.”

“Careful, my dear husband. Your scared shitless father is showing.”

Eddie speaks up from bedside Bobby. Calm and leaning against the fire truck since after yelling Evan’s name and taking a moment to think. Calm and quiet ever since he went inside. Ever since Athena read off a text. They were dealing with a Buck with a plan. “They made a big mistake. They tried to hurt Christopher. You’re talking about the man that survived a bomb in our ladder truck, a pulmonary embolism. That tried to outrun an ocean wave and walked half a city looking for a little boy just over a year ago barely able to walk. That turned down millions of dollars so he can do this. Not be a hero but keep people _safe._ He loves that little boy to never stop _. What did you expect him to do?”_

They can hear Hondo yelling.

“Stand down.” The S.W.A.T. leader is yelling at Buck but he doesn't listen. He can barely make out what the man is saying from the ringing in his ears. He jumps up, turns around and takes off running. The ringing slowly going away as his brain plays Superman and Lois Lane on repeat.

“Where is that boy going now?” Athena grabs Bobby’s arm. She can feel the tension in him.

“To get our son from where he told him to hide.” Eddie says pushing away from the truck.

“Hen, Chim. Get a gurney ready.” Bobby orders. Is it possible to be proud and pissed at the same time?

Buck keeps running until he reaches the room he left Christopher and Emily calling their names.

“Daddy! Daddy!” Christopher yells.

Buck slides down on his knees and opens a cabinet.

Christopher looks at Emily. “I told you my daddy would save us. He promised.”

Buck finally feels like he is breathing when he sees them. Like he’s been holding his breath underwater for an hour.

“There’s my Superman, did you keep your Lois lane safe?”

“Lois Lane?” Emily asks.

“Oh yeah. Bravest woman to walk the earth that reports the truth. I know a brave woman when I see one and you fit that name perfectly.” Bucks tells her.

“I’m just a little girl.” Buck can see her puffy eyes. Her glasses are missing showing off her light violet eyes. Neither one of them are bleeding.

“You know what? You’re off to a great start. I can’t wait to see how you take on this world.”

He moves Christopher’s crutches and pulls the two out. Wrapping his arms around them. Standing up he has one in each arm, trying to hold onto Christopher’s crutches with each hand.

“How well can you see our Lois Lane?”

“Everything is one big blobby blur.”

“It’s okay. I got you. You trust me okay.” Buck tells her.

“You kept the bad man from hurting me. It was scary but you stopped him. You’ll keep me safe.”

“Where are your glasses, sweetheart?”

“They fell off when we were running to hide.” Emily tells him with her head on his shoulder.

“Okay, I need you two to listen to me and promise me you’ll do it. It’s very important.” He looks around but sees no sign of her glasses. He needs to get then out of here. 

“Yes, Daddy.” Christopher says. Emily just nods her head.

“I need you both to close your eyes real tight. Christopher, can you take your glasses off for daddy? Good, now keep them closed, hold onto me and hide your faces in my neck and don’t move or open your eyes until I say it’s okay. Got it?”

“We have to, Emmy. Daddy promised to always be there and he keeps his promises so we have to keep ours.”

“I promise,” Emily says quietly.

Buck kisses the top of her head. “It’s okay to be scared and brave our little Lois Lane.”

“You got me.” Emily says against his neck.

“Yeah, I got you. Chris, buddy, can you keep a tight hold on your crutches?”

”Yes, Daddy.”

”I’ll hold onto one.” Emily volunteers.

He walks down the hallway feeling their faces directly in his neck where they can’t see anything and his son’s crutches against his chest along with tiny fingers digging a tight hold on the back of his shirt.

He walks past the S.W.A.T leader that is about to chew him out then he sees the kids, looks just inside where the doors used to be and moves to let him pass with a look of understanding on his face.

He heads straight for Hen and Chim and one of the many gurneys sitting out. Sitting them down, he takes Christopher’s crutches from the two and lays them next to side where Emily isn’t sitting next to him. Eddie sweeps Christopher up in his arms.

“Okay, my brave little ones. Superman and Lois Lane. You can open your eyes now and put your glasses back on, Christopher.”

“Ow.” Emily says covering her eyes with her hands

“Can you keep your eyes closed but move your hands for me, my brave girl?” Buck asks her as he grabs Eddie’s shades and places them on her face. “Now you’re stylin’. Ask S.W.A.T. to retrieve her glasses, please. They’re in the Science class. Did the others make it out okay?”

“Perfectly. Just like a text of a well thought out plan a teacher showed me.” Athena tells him.

“We got blood on her but I can’t find a wound.” Hen searches frantically.

“Mr. Buck got shot keeping the bad man from shooting me.” Emily says.

Hen looks at Buck, Bobby and Eddie grab him as his knees buckle, the adrenaline leaving him and forcing him to sit on a gurney.

Hen looks everywhere then sees the gushing hand. “Jesus Buck, what did you do, grab the damn gun as he was shooting it?” She shakes her head as he lifts an eyebrow and tilts his head. Lips pursed.

“Really want me to answer that?” Buck asks her.

Hen puts a pressure bandage on both sides. “You look like hell. Thank whoever watches over you you’re not on blood thinners anymore or else you’d be bleeding out right now. That gash on your forehead needs stitches and that hand, sorry but since I’m a betting woman I’m thinking surgery. Don’t get me started on that arm. Shit, Buck your leg to? Why is your side covered in blo……Chim, I need you. We need to head out. We got a bleeder. Can you turn around for me, Buckaroo, or do you need help?” She asks grabbing yet another pressure bandage for his side.

“So on a scale of one to ten how pissed is Bobby and do I need witness protection from Athena?” Buck asks as he tries to put his feet up on the gurney.

“You’re bleeding out and you’re worried…..” Hen shakes her head as she and Chim pick up his legs and transfer them onto the gurney.

Chim is eerily quiet.

“What do you mean he got shot?! You stupid, foolish, stubborn, hot headed…….what am I going to do with you.” Athena wraps Buck in her arms.

“He has a stab wound in his lower right torso.” Hen adds. “We need to get him to the ER.”

“Athena?” Buck wipes away a tear from her cheek.

“What made you? What did I tell you about waterfalls?” She looks over at Eddie and Chris. “Never mind. I already know…” she freezes as she hears Christopher’s next words to his father.

“They shot my lunchbox. I had it in front of me but my fire engine stopped the bad man from hurting me.” 

“I’ll never tell that kid to stop talking about that lunchbox ever again.” Hen murmurs to Chim.

“Hey Buck, you think you can let me get a line started?” Chim quietly asks him.

Buck watches as a bald black man in S.W.A.T. tactical gear approaches his gurney.

“Hi. Um, I’m Hondo. We’re walking through the building now. All the kids are out. No injuries except for, except for the casualties. The guys are in custody. They actually need some medical attention. You beat the shit out of them pretty good.” He lowers his voice so the kids can’t hear, “What’s in there. What you saw in there. Getting those kids out. Respect man. By the way. I was told you asked for us to find these. I wanted to deliver them to you personally.” He hands over a pair of glasses, with tinted thick lenses and a pink band.

“I want him fired!” Can be heard all through the area.

“Warning, The Police Chief is here.” Hondo mutters. “Good luck with that.”

“Who was it?” The Fire Chief demands.

“Evan Buckley sir.” Bobby replies.

“The little shit that had the nerve to sue us….he’s done Nash.”

“Chief.” Bobby tries to get a word in but both the Fire and Police Chiefs are standing in front of Buck demanding he be arrested to being fired immediately.

The police chief lets out a yelp. “You leave my daddy alone.” Christopher yells hitting the police chief in the leg again with his crutch.

“He kept his promise to always be there. Like when the water came he came and saved me. You don’t get to yell at my daddy.”

“Christopher, come here Superman.” Buck has yet to register Christopher has been calling him daddy since they came out of the cabinet but someone else notices. Many someone elses notice.

Eddie just looks at Christopher clinging to his savior for dear life. They were safe. He’s seen war. He knows what a grenade can do. He doesn’t have to picture what went on in there or why CSU is wrapping the building with tape. It’ll be hours before the bodies can be moved. Families told. Families broken.

The bastards stuck a gun into the face of a little seven year old girl, taunting her. Christopher told him it sounded like those loud fireworks going off and big booms like on T.V., that he tried to protect his Lois Lane from the screaming. Then daddy came, choking the one guy and grabbing the gun getting shot. Told them to run and hide. He’d come back for them. He promised. Then they were under the cabinet and alarms were blaring. Then his daddy came back like he promised.

He always saves his son. Their son. The words Eddie told him after the tsunami come back. You love him enough to never stop trying. He looks like shit. A bloody pile of shit and he did it for their family.

Fuck it.

He takes Buck’s face in his hands, cupping his cheeks and lays his lips against his. Laying his forehead against his. “The word.” Is all he says and Buck just nods.

“Please leave Mr Buck alone.” A small gentle voice says.

“Children I understand it’s been a traumatic day, you really should be with the medics.” The Police Chief starts.

Buck ignores him and zooms in on little Emily. “There’s our Lois Lane. I have something for you. Come on up.” Eddie gently sits her between his legs. “Close your eyes real tight, sweetheart.” He takes off Eddie’s sunglasses and replaces them with her own, securing the band around the back of her head, careful not to pull her hair. “Okay, open those beauties wide.”

“You found them!” She gasps.

“The nice police officers found them.”

Emily carefully turns around, knowing her hero is hurt. “He saved us.” Emily starts telling them. “The bad man had a gun pointed at my face and he grabbed him and it went in his hand instead of me then he told us to go hide and promised he would come back and he did. He told us to keep our eyes closed. That it was important we did. He saved us.”

“Emmy?” The fire chief whispers. “Oh my god, Emmy. This, this is your new school?” The Fire Chief grabs his chest, looking like he is about to pass out. He brushes a paramedic off.

“Mr Buck saved us grandpa. Why are you yelling at him?” Emily wants to know.

“Because I did something bad, sweetheart.” Buck tells her.

“Like when I don’t eat my veggies?” The sweet voice replies.

Buck gives a half smile. “Kinda like that. I broke some rules. Those rules are there to keep people safe and to save them and I broke them so now I have to be a big boy and take my punishment.”

“But you saved us. You called me Lois Lane because I’m brave like her and she goes after the truth to report it because that’s what matters. That’s the truth. He saved me, grandpa. He saved us, he got shot and stabbed doing it.”

The fire Chief just looks over at the man his granddaughter is clinging to. “He’s hurt, shot and stabbed?”

“Stab wound to the lower torso as well as a through and through to the palm and multiple deep lacerations, sir.” Hen tells him.

“Then why the hell isn’t he on the way to the ER?” The Fire Chief demands having done a total one-eighty

“Because HE came over and started yelling at my Daddy.” Christopher points to the Police Chief with his crutch then at him. “So, did you.”

“Your and your significant other’s son was in…..we sent a unit to the scene with family in there?” The Fire Chief’s face turns a dark red as he turns to the Police Chief.

“It’s an active shooter. All hands on deck.” The police chief growls. “I want his job. Today.”

The Fire Chief picks up his granddaughter, watching as she leans over and kisses Buckley’s cheek as they load him into the ambulance. He turns to Athena. “There were texts? He came up with the plan, not the police.”

“Yes, sir.” Athena answers.

“Howard….” The Police Chief starts.

“I want to see them. Nash. Get your team and his son to the hospital. Sirens on.” He looks over at a crying Athena. “Take your wife with you. The 118 is on lockdown.”

“Yes, sir.” Bobby rubs on Eddie’s arm. “Get your son and lets go be with our boy.

“Howard, I want him **_fired now!_** ”

“Bernard.” The fire chief pulls his granddaughter closer. She had a gun in her face and the man being lead away in an ambulance followed by a fire truck took the bullet. Who does that? It was past time to get from behind his desk and get to know who works for him. “Just. Shut. Up.”

Bobby turns his head away from Buck, another lone survivor laying asleep in his lap and looks over at the forty-three little white crosses off from the cracked cemented courtyard in a patch of grass. Seven adults. Thirty-six kids.

A bundle of daisies at each one. 

A symbol of innocence.

The same fresh bundle of flowers Buck has been changing out on each cross this time everyday.

Athena discussed at length with Bobby what Christopher told his dad about the lunchbox. There had been a bullet meant for him. One of those little caskets could have been him. One of those caskets could have been Buck.

There have been times over the past six weeks he wonders if there wasn’t.

The gunmen are dead. One taking the cowards way out by hanging himself with his bedsheets, the other shanked in the cafeteria. Prisoners have an automatic vendetta for those who hurt children. Especially incarcerated fathers.

The motive they found had been their disabled sister killing herself six months prior with their mother having issues coping. They blamed her and the school instead of getting help and accepting when she found out her condition had turned terminal that she wanted to go out on her own terms.

There are no crosses for them.

It didn’t make it okay or excusable. We all have choices on how we deal with trauma. Maddie and Buck are prime examples. Like he wouldn’t have Athena do a background check on the name Buckley in Hershey, Pennsylvania. There is only one family with that name.

The Fire Chief during their meeting had shown him letter after letter of support for Buck. The S.W.A.T. leader writing a letter asking for him to go through the training to join his team. Even going as far as putting it on official letter head “After seeing the carnage that happened inside that day, honestly I would have done the same. Frankly, I don’t know if I would have shown the restraint he did and I say that as the leader of the A team. I commend him for that and for devising a plan to get the children out without seeing the violence done to their school. A place they should feel safe. If not for Evan Buckley there would have been more loss of life. He was putting into action a plan we should have already had. This city was and is not ready for an active shooter when these events are on the rise. As leader and commander of S.W.A.T. team A of the Los Angeles Police Department it is my duty to tell you we failed this city, the community and that school on August 12th, 2020. It took one man to point that out.”

The Fire Chief told him he has the original framed and on the shelf next to a picture of his granddaughter.

They had saved his job. A compromise. Suspended until further notice for breaking protocol. The Police Chief is livid. The Fire Chief pointing out he has egg on his face for not having his department ready. Something the Mayor is looking into. Plus, the news showing a little boy hitting him with his crutch as he can be seen yelling at the man that carried said boy and a little girl out after disarming the gunmen on the news. It had all been shown live.

Needless to say the LAPD is not having a good time right now.

The 118 isn’t either. With Eddie in family leave and Buck suspended. Their replacements aren’t doing a very good job of filling their shoes.

Bobby watches the pure white kitten stretch, yawn and curl back up in his lap.

A kitten that found Buck from the killed unofficial school mascot and her litter of kittens that somehow survived when he went back the first time to deliver the daisies.

That time laying them in the empty entryway. The crosses went up that afternoon after the noon news showed the savior firefighter putting the flowers down.

Buck hated that title. Hated the media making him a martyr. It wasn’t about him. Half of what they were reporting wasn’t even right. It’s about forty-two lives. Eventually the news moved on. Buck on the other hand. He is sitting in front of the school after all.

He had taken her home naming her Milagro, Millie for short. Spanish for miracle. Healthy without a scratch on her. Eddie said Buck might as well take her the way she was pawing at him. She had chosen him to be her hero. Buck had announced as she curled up in his arms she wouldn’t be a reminder of what they lost but of what they didn’t. She might as well be his shadow.

Buck just starts talking to him as he rubs his fingertip under her tiny chin. The purring a soothing orchestra.

“Carl has five children. Five children without a daddy. A sixteen year old that won’t get that fatherly glare at her boyfriends. A three month old that will grow up not knowing him. Five girls that won’t have a daddy walk them down the aisle.

Eddie picked my phone up for me while I was in the hospital under observation. You know when I finally convinced him the hospital was safe enough for him to get some real food, a shower, say hello to our son other than on the phone. I’m not sure his “not with you in it” was worry or an insult.

He brought me my phone. Fixed. I had a couple missed text from Carl. Sent at 8:25 a.m. pictures of his new baby. Of him holding her with a bonus family photo. The last text was ‘Beer Saturday night?’ His phone blew up in the grenade explosion that killed him.

You think that would hurt. Seeing the little bodies torn apart. Seeing one of my son’s friends missing the back of his head.

You know what really hurts? Is I can see Maria with them pointing a gun against her forehead telling them she forgives them before they shot her brains out because that’s something she would do and now Bela is on her own. She told me at the funeral she wants to devote her life to becoming a full time missionary. There’s too much evil in this world, if she can give back to fight it in any way she’s going to do it. Maria would have gone up one side me and down the other for putting her on that path. Then hugged me and thanked me. Then swear on the day of Christopher’s graduation to remind me to repay me the favor. I was looking forward to that.

Knowing her she would have found a way for him to be a firefighter.”

“Actually that’s why I’m here. A Captain Strand out of Austin, Texas has been rebuilding his firehouse for awhile now. It’s been a struggle. He called the Chief, that now wants me to call him Howard. Strand wants you.”

“T.K. must have seen the news. His son. Old friend from New York. His dad was there at ground zero on 9/11. One of the scariest days of his life. Watching on T.V. nobody telling you if your dad is dead when you barely understand what’s going on yourself.”

“Yeah. I know that feeling. Lived it recently. Still pissed at you just so you know.”

“As in I can’t do my job pissed…….”

“No. As in I watched my kid run into a building with gun and grenade wielding unstable men that killed without remorse. Don’t do that again. Ever. You scared the shit out of me.

You had it back Buck. The lawsuit last year. You wanted back.

Why?”

“My kid was in a building with unstable men that killed without remorse. I found something more important than being a firefighter. A family. Christopher is more important than that costume I told you I needed. I get why you lied to me about being on light duty now. You know that switch I told you I couldn’t flip when I dropped out of the Seals training program?”

“It flipped.” Bobby quietly replies. “I get why you wanted back so bad. That standing there. Not being able to do anything. I know we already buried it but I never realized how you felt having to stand down and just watch until I had to do it.

The chief told me to pass on the message his new secretary somehow lost all the paperwork you signed last year after the lawsuit to come back to work.”

“Bobby you and I both know suspended until further notice means I’m not coming back.”

“Tell the Fire Chief that. By the way. I get called in for a meeting with our Chief because of Strand. I get all dressed up. Go down to his office, get sent to the park. He’s dressed down. He wants to be in the stations more. Emily says hi by the way. Hondo wants you on his team. There isn’t a department in this city that doesn’t want you or your input.”

“Bobby. Even if I got offered back I don’t know if L.A. is the place for me anymore.”

Bobby looks up as a hand strokes the head of the tiny kitten. “It’s time to go home mi corazón. Hey, Bobby.” Eddie says crouching down in front of them.

“Hey Eddie.”

“Christopher?” Buck asks.

“At my Abuela’s. He’s still talking her ear off about Emily.”

“Buck was telling me about his Abuela.”

“Our Spanish speaking household is spilling out into the real world, I see.” Eddie holds out his hand as he gets up. “Let’s go spend some time with our boy.”

The house is quiet. Buck and Eddie are staring at each other, laying on their sides as the midnight darkness surrounds them. Their sweaty bodies cooling off as they each have a hand on one another’s chest. The bed clothes tossed hazardously on the floor mixed in with their clothes. Their legs tangled as they lay torso to torso, chest to chest.

“You think I should go, don’t you?” Buck whispers.

“You’re my Buck. You will always be my Buck. No matter where you are.” Eddie whispers back.

“When I found her, Carla had been hit by the second grenade. She helped me send the text out. Begged me to let her do that one last thing. She told me she had a best friend that loved her but she was too scared to say it back. She told me I should tell you. Then she was gone.”

“Is that why you haven’t said it, you’re afraid?”

“No. I haven’t said it because I wanted it to be because I wanted to say it and not a dying woman’s last words.”

“You know I already know. Just by the way you look at me. You’ve been telling me. When Abby came back and I thought since I went back to Shannon, I underestimated you. You showed up on my doorstep after telling her goodbye, I saw the look in your eyes and you spent the night in my bed, even if it was with our clothes on. It was the first time I realized you’ve been telling me for years.”

“You said you never wanted to go back to Texas.”

“El Paso may be where my family is but it is my past. I need to find a future for Christopher. My Abuela is here but this isn’t home anymore. There are too many nightmares haunting us here.”

“You want me to go.”

“I want you to be somewhere that isn’t slowly killing your soul.”

“Hey.” Chim greets Maddie sitting the takeout on the kitchen counter.

“Hey.” Is the lackluster reply back from the corner of the couch. Maddie sitting with her knees bent and bare feet up on the cushion. Gave a blank, emotionless mask.

“Okay. I love you and at the risk of Buck doing very unmentionable hurtful things to me, baby we gotta say something to each other besides hey.” Chim says gently sitting on the couch next to her.

“I never knew he was going to be a Seal. Had lunch with him today. He hated Doug. You know up there in Big Bear if Doug wasn’t already dead…”

“He would have went Navy Seal on his ass?”

“Yeah. He dropped out because he didn’t want to be an unemotional machine that killed without remorse.”

“Buck cries at the Budweiser commercials with the dog.”

“He would have killed them and felt nothing.” Her eyes aren’t red. She’s numb. Emotionless.

“He stopped himself because he’s still our Buck.” Chim says gently, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

“No, he’s not and you know it. He’s transferring to Texas. They took something from him in that building and they’re still taking even dead. They’re taking my little brother away from me because he can’t be **_here_.** I know what that’s like.”

“He’s not running from an ex trying to kill him.”

“No. He’s not running but this city has been slowly killing him. Suffocating him and choking the life out of him.”

“Then hopefully he finds what he needs. There’s FaceTime. A wedding for him to come back for. I’ll even take one for the team, do my manly duty and keep him in a supply of nieces and nephews.”

Maddie laughs. Then starts crying. “He’s never coming back here.”

“There’s my girl. If all else fails. Texas is a big state. I’m sure there are plenty of EMTs always needed.”

“You’d move to Texas?”

“I’d move to the moon for you, baby.” Chim says as Maddie moves to lay against him.

Eddie is sitting on the park bench watching Christopher play with Emily. His Lois Lane.

“It helps her. Spending time with him.”

“Chief?” Eddie asks bewildered.

“No. Today I’m a grandfather named Howard and you’re a father named Eddie. He still getting nightmares?” He asks, sitting on the bench with Eddie.

“Si, he knows how to deal with them though because of the tsunami.”

“That’s where she got how to better deal with them from. Emily has been asking about her Mr. Buck. I was wondering. Wasn’t Buck with him then as well? On leave. I looked it up. He saved a lot of people that day. I finally read the letters from them. He’s a stubborn one, isn’t he? No matter the cost to him. I read the report on his injuries.”

“He was there and he is but I’m not complaining because that stubbornness saved our son. Twice. Besides, it’s oddly endearing and makes him all the more lovable.”

“I hated that boy. For filing the lawsuit. Making the department look bad when we didn’t even thank him for doing his duty he swore an oath to. I get it now. Why he filed it. I’ve been behind that desk so long I forgot what the job means. He reminded me of that. Safety and protection. He also taught me another valuable lesson as well.”

“What would that be?”

“To not only listen but to hear. My daughter told me all Summer she found a school that is a better fit for Emily. Told me the name every time. I tuned her out so much I didn’t even know my own granddaughter was in there.”

“You know now. Sometimes that is what matters the most.”

Eddie watches as Howard looks at the two children laughing together. “I know now.”

“What are these?” Eddie asks as Bobby hands him a stack of papers before he even gets into the ambulance bay.

“Your transfer papers. They’re signed a filled out.”

“You trying to get rid of me?” Eddie jokes. Bobby sees right past it.

“You really going to stay here without Buck?”

“So you already know why I’m here.”

“I know my boys. Your Abuela is here but L.A., there comes a time that you’re not running from your nightmares but you need to hit that restart button. Besides, Captain Strand called me after he heard from you. Told him he is getting the two most stubborn idiots that I have ever worked with and he’s damn lucky to have them. He was already singing Buck’s praises. I told him to wait a week or so. He told me he already knows what kind of man he is. He saved his son from self destructing once. He still having nightmares?”

“Who? Christopher or Buck?”

“Both.”

“Chris, yes, but he’s handling them better than after the tsunami. Buck is…….different. His eyes are.”

“Haunted. I get it. Why he has to leave. The Fire Chief, Howard, isn’t happy losing him. Hell S.W.A.T. wants him so bad they’re willing to make him a position. They’re going to tear down the school. Make it a memorial park. A place for laughter. Apparently a little bird heard someone say that would be nice and told another little bird he spends time with that told her grandpa to make it happen. They’re trying to find money in the budget for it.”

“Hello?” A woman’s voice calls out.

“Ed-e. Buc friend. Did you worc on your tone issues?” A little brown haired, brown eye girl asks him when she sees him

“Hi.” Eddie just stands there starring.

“Helena and my daughter, Tracey. From the irresponsible teenager that left her in the Camaro.”

“I remember.” Eddie is still trying to get his brain to register about Buck and little girls.

“Present for my friend Buc.” Tracey says.

“We saw the news. What happened. Found out his son, your son, was in there. We wanted to come by sooner but figured with his hand he might be out. We were hoping he’d be back by now. Tracey has been talking nonstop about her friend Buck to any and everyone. Both teddy bear and human.”

“Mr. Buckley isn’t coming back.” Eddie bluntly states.

Tracey leans forward, poking Eddie. “Tone issues.”

“Was he hurt that bad?”

“No ma’am he’s on administrative leave. Suspended until further notice.” Bobby notices her body tense.

“But he saved all those people.” Helena says slowly as Chim and Hen lean up against the ambulance.

“Yes ma’am.” He doesn’t know what to say to her.

“Yet he’s getting punished?”

“He broke protocol ma’am. He broke the rules set in place for an event…..”

“That this city wasn’t ready for. I didn’t tell you how my husband died, did I?”

“No ma’am.”

“He was shot during a routine traffic stop because he was following protocol that hasn’t been changed since Bernard Ruggers became Police Chief. You and I both know there was no protocol, no plan, for what happened that day.”

“Mama mad?” Tracey asks with a tilt of her head.

“Yes, baby, but not at you.” Helena says, taping her nose.

“See Buc now?” Tracey says clapping her hands.

“Buck has to stay home a little bit longer, baby.”

“Buc still sic?”

“Actually ma’am, Buck is transferring to Austin, Texas.” Bobby explains.

“Buc go bye-bye?”

“Buck go bye-bye with me and our little boy.” Eddie says in a soft tone.

“Oh. Tell him I saw baby giraffe and feed them. Give him this for me?” She takes the objects Helena has been holding, handing Eddie a white and black striped stuffed tiger and a hand made card that reads:

**_ To Our Hero  _ **

**_ That Protects Us Just Like His Tigers _ **

Inside is a drawing of a tiger and a fireman holding a little girl’s hand.

**_ Thank You Buc _ **

“This too, please.” She leans over wrapping her arms around Eddies neck and kissing his cheek. “Tell him will always be Tracey’s friend.” The little girl is teary eyed as she buries her face in her mom’s neck.

“I will. Promise.” Eddie whispers, rubbing the back of her head.

“We should.” Helena has tears of her own in her eyes. “We should get going. Would you tell Buck my sister got a job at a nursing home and is volunteering at the hospital. She’s done a total one-eighty attitude and behavior wise because of him. Something our father is amazed over. She shows him respect now when before she mouthed off. Wants to be a firefighter when she graduates this year because of him. This is a real loss for the LAFD.”

Eddie and Bobby watch them walk toward the bay doors as Helena dials a number in her phone. “Yes, Mayor Harper please. I need to speak with him. I know he’s busy but I believe he told his staff to get him whenever his daughter called.”

A squeal of “Grandpa, they made my friend leave,” from Tracey can be heard.

“Buck saved the Mayor’s granddaughter and shook his daughter straight. Go Buck” Hen says.

“Why do I have a feeling y’all are getting a new Police Chief? I need to get going. I have a hug and kiss to pass along. Ah, Bobby. Buck doesn’t know about me…” Eddie holds up the papers.

“Won’t hear it from me. Hey, Eddie? Make sure you make Austin a true new start. Remember, y’all always have a place and a home here. Family.”

Eddie walks back. Hugging Bobby. “Family isn’t always blood.” He lets go. Gives them and the station one last look and walks away.

“You really going to let them go?” Chim asks quietly from against the ambulance.

“Sometimes you have to Chim.”

“You know Texas has hurricanes and tornadoes.”

“Chim. Buck survived a psycho raping therapist, choking, an earthquake, a bomb, a tsunami, us, using a fire truck as a surfboard, the return of an ex that was ghosting him because she needed to have a sexual revolution and a school shooting. Hurricanes and tornadoes would be too scared of that boy’s mojo.”

“You can drop the act, Hen.” Bobby murmurs

“Our boys are leaving us. Who the hell am I gonna give shit now?” She sobs as the three gather together and cry.

“I heard the Police Chief got a call from the Mayor. Got his ass chewed for daring to yell at the man that saved his granddaughter.” Bobby tells Athena from behind her as she sits at her vanity in their bedroom as she gets ready for bed.

“Granddaughter?” Athena has been unusually quiet the last few days.

“Remember little Tracey from the Camaro? Her and her mom stopped by. Her maiden name happens to be Harper.”

“As in….”

“Mayor Harper. Her father. She wasn’t happy about Buck.”

“Our Buckaroo has surely proven you just don’t know who you are saving, hasn’t he? No wonder the station was in an uproar today. S.W.A.T. is getting together with Homeland Security to put together an active shooter drill and task force. See where their issues are, weaknesses. How to make it in there faster instead of wasting time trying to put a plan together on the fly. Hondo was pushing for Buck to be team leader on it. Our boy has come a long way.”

“He has. The Mayor also approved the Memorial Park with a fountain that lists all the victims names. Seems like an unanimous donor came forward since they were trying to find the money in the budget. The Mayor’s daughter wants to be a firefighter, she got a typed letter stating her schooling will be paid for if she gets her Fire/Science degree before joining. Carl’s wife, the security guard from the school, woke up to a brand new SUV in her driveway paid in full with a secured case containing five hundred thousand dollars. Bela, also received the same amount to fund her mission trips. Emily all the sudden has a college fund set up in her name. It’s as if someone with a trust fund they hate having and never use decided to use it after all to spread good.”

“They’re leaving us, aren’t they?”

“Do you really blame them?”

Athena looks at the reflection of her husband in the mirror behind her. “No,” she whispers quietly.

“They’re going to Austin.” Bobby tells her laying his hands on her shoulders. She just nods her head as a lone tear falls down her cheek. He squeezes her shoulders when he says, “I’ve been thinking. I’ve had a good career. Maybe it’s time to pack it up and retire. Hit that restart button.” Athena just reaches up, takes his hand and kisses it.

Buck is emotionally drained. The Sun isn’t even up yet. Saying goodbye to Maddie had been hard but she understood. He also didn’t sleep well on the cot in his empty apartment. He knew if he stayed the night with Eddie and Christopher he wouldn’t go but this was something he had to do. Ghost are chasing him every time he closes his eyes. How close he came to becoming a killer himself haunts him.

Surprising little Tracey though. That had been a life highlight. Getting a hug goodbye. Her telling him “always friend. Call me if you need me.” He had left with Helena’s number, promises of FaceTime and a picture on his phone to print out and frame. If Helena found an envelope with Tracey’s name on it saying “for our future polar bear activist” and a college fund set up. Well, he wouldn’t know anything about that.

He finally found a way to cleanse his soul of what he felt like was left to him blood money.

“What are you two doing here?” Buck asks turning around after securing Millie’s cat carrier in the back seat of the Jeep to see his two Diaz loves standing there with four suitcases.

“Where you go, we go. We’ll fly back for Chim and Maddie’s wedding. Drive back in the truck. I already have the house up for sale and movers are packing it up and should have it all there by the time we get there. I borrowed yours by the way. Figured since the truck is going to the same place. Plus, you don’t have much. Since you already bought a nice size house paid in full and all. Expecting someone to need all that room?” Eddie raises an eyebrow at him.

“I was hoping one day….you said L.A. wasn’t your home anymore. You needed to find a future for Chris, Texas is your past.” Buck stands there playing with the hem of his shirt.

“Today’s a good a day as any. Plus, I want to meet this T.K. that has his father singing your praises.” Eddie finds room in the back of the sparsely packed Jeep for the suitcases. Buck really didn’t have much stuff. He sees a box with a framed photo sticking out. The one Athena told him he should frame of them at the zoo. He finds a loving handmade card framed with a stuffed tiger. Then another framed card with a surfboard on it. Finally the framed picture from Christmas dinner at the firehouse.

Evan Buckley may act like he goes for the material things but it’s the sentimental moments he finds priceless.

He knew then he made the right decision. When Eddie gets back to the front of the Jeep, he cups Buck’s face in his hands. “El Paso is my past, where ever you are is our future and our home.”

“T.K. and I are just friends, we never dated. He’s in a serious relationship with a police officer.”  
  


“Buck. You don’t have to, okay? You weren’t my first love, I wasn’t yours but we’re each other’s last’s. That’s what matters.”

“My Lois Lane gave me her email and her mama and grandpa said we can FaceTime everyday.” Christopher says as he climbs into the backseat, Eddie making sure he’s secured in place when a little meow comes from the carrier. “Hi, Millie. We’re going to be riding buddies.” Another quiet meow.

“It won’t be the same.” Buck whispers after they’re in their seats and buckled in.

“I know. We’ll never have what we had here but sometimes different is a good thing. Besides it seems like Captain Strand needs not only more staff but is excited to have an engaged homosexual couple on his team.” Eddie smirks.

“Eddie, we’re not engaged.” Buck has that confused look on his face that makes Eddie grin.

“We have been, you just didn’t know it.” Buck just blinks and smiles over at Eddie who has his head turned towards him leaned back against the headrest of his seat.

“I love you.” Buck says, face soft.

Eddie reaches over and caresses his cheek with the back of his hand. “I love you.”

“Okay, we missing anything?” Buck asks, shaking off his sudden rush of emotions. It’s going to be okay. He’s going to be okay.

“A little girl.” Eddie deadpans.

“I think we might be able to find one or two of those somewhere in Texas.” Buck is pulling away from the curb when they take each other’s hands. “You know. Vegas isn’t that much of a detour on the way.”

“It’s four hours out of the way, Buck.”

“It’s a two day trip anyway, Mr. We’ve Been Engaged I Just Didn’t Know It.” Eddie just laughs as Buck kisses his hand. “Hey Superman.” Buck looks in the rear view at Christopher talking to Millie. “How you feel about a detour to Vegas so me and your dad can get married?”

“Aren’t you already married?” Chris asks with a perplexed look on his face.

Buck kisses Eddie’s hand again as they both laugh and they drive off to the east. Towards the clear skies of the beginnings of a new sunrise, a new day and a new start. 

Down the road behind them unseen in a navy SUV Bobby sits behind the steering wheel, holding Athena’s hand with tears in both their eyes. Sitting in the seats behind them, Chim with Maddie’s head on his shoulder and Hen with her head on Karen’s shoulder.

Bobby has that pain in his chest again.

He’s been having it since Buck like a stealth weapon slithered into a building with two men hell bent on terror carrying guns and live grenades. Since he got a phone call from the Chief. Since he signed off on two sets of paperwork that would take his sons away from him Since he saw two people in love denying their happiness.

Now though, he knows what it is. All along thinking it was heart burn.

It’s been his heart slowly breaking knowing what was coming. That day when Buck asked if he ever suddenly felt like something bad was going to happen and Bobby played it off as first day of school parent jitters because he was feeling it too.

It’s parental instinct. His heart was preparing him for this moment because it knew what he was denying even before it happened.

His parental heart knew.

As Bobby holds Athena’s hand up against his lips they watch their boys drive away until the Jeep disappears then the first fat rain drop hits the windshield.

Rainbows would never be rainbows

If sunshine had never met rain

No one would ever need comfort

If there was no sadness and pain

But life holds both sunshine and showers

The days are not all bright and fair

So look through the showers for the rainbows

You will always find hope shining there

\- Michael O. Adesanya

P.S. In case you were wondering. It is a bright sunny day without a drop of rain when Superman marries **_HIS_** Lois Lane.

**Author's Note:**

> In my original draft Christopher dies and Buck finds him while he bleeds out in his arms  
> Eddie ends up sleeping in his truck because he can’t stand being in the house  
> Buck takes him to the motel he’s been living at because his apartment holds too many memories  
> I went into like a deep dark place after that and went nope, not happening and changed it to where Christopher lives  
> We don’t need that much angst in our lives ya angst hoes


End file.
